Background; I have had depression and anxiety most of my life. Many different meds, treatments, counselors and voodoo stuff. Please don’t tell me I need to eat better, sleep better, do yoga, walk my dog, or just look at the bright side. I know all these things. Like many of you, I know what I need to do to get better, but this illness paralyzes me.
Sadly I know a lot about it. But now that I am heading into menopause, I am worse than I’ve ever been. Struggle at work, to the point I put in my notice without anywhere to go. And no money. No spouse or friends to help me, because I push them all away. I have Crazy anger blowouts. Crying over everything. I can be doing something fun and still be miserable. That’s a bunch of bullshit. I truly don’t feel like me anymore.

I’m not in a position to be hospitalized, but I am not well. . I had made the mistake of telling my doc that I’ve had some very rough days lately with so she doesn’t want to refill my Xanax or Ambien. (She tells me to eat better. For f sake). So much for being honest. Now my anxiety is though the roof and ready to give up. I asked to start Zoloft per a psychiatrist recommendation. My doctor wants me to wait two more weeks before doing that. I don’t know how much longer I can take living like this. Scheduled later this week to see a new doctor, hopefully one with some empathy. And real help.
#Empathy #tiredoffighting ##amitheonlyone Ruiningmylife #IFeelLikeABurden #Alonewithnosupport

Thanks for letting me vent. Maybe someone out there knows what I’m talking about. Because everyone in my life doesn’t seem to get it. So I stay #silentlysinking