I have been doing so good for so long, I’ve always had body image problems when I was young I was anorexic for the last several months I have been on a weight loss drug but I realize it’s making my ibs worse so I stop talking it. Of course I’m sure I’m gaining weight I haven’t been able to get on the scale. But when I’m losing weight or trying to I tend to get on every day. All I seem to do is eat drink and sleep anymore. I work 6 days a week so I don’t have time for hobbies, or a social life (not like there’s anyone trying to be my friend anyways) Every time I gain weight my depression or bipolar gets worse I’m 5’3 and 140lbs. I know it’s in my head I know if I looked at someone else that was 5’3 and 140lbs I wouldn’t think twice about their weight. I’ve never been good enough on any level ever. This whole weekend my emotions have been all over the place with the quickness. I started looking forward to dinner time so it would be late enough in the day I can start drinking, that made me think I’m probably drinking too much. I’m sorry if this is horribly worded my thoughts r all over the place. Sorry I just need to talk to someone, husband is asleep and I have no friends cause no one cares. I never post any of my emotional crap on fb I have this place or a secret board on Pinterest. But today I posted a meme on fb about ‘stop texting first and see how many dead plants I’ve been watering’ I almost didn’t want to post it to get the fake responses that people miss me and care about me but I did anyways. And not a single person said anything they just liked the post. Because no one really cares until something bad happens then all of a sudden they loved you and miss you. #BipolarDepression #doingbadagain #Noonecares #wanttosleep #drinkingtoomuch #fatandlonely #wouldntbemissed