Just Letting It Out
I just want to take this off my chest.
Finally got the courage to confess to a guys that I was attracted to. He told me I'm not his type unless for sex, in which he has no type as long as he gets it, because he doesn't like commitments. I know that's his rights and freedom..But it still hurts.
Got a friend whom I always check on her, and she said I can talk to her about my own worries. Finally took the offer, and now she went silent for almost two weeks, not even responding to "how are you"?" .
Wake up recently feeling more exhausted than before sleeping. Went to sleep but so many negative thoughts running in my head.
Struggling to study for an upcoming exam, as there's no motivation, and keep repeating same lines without it ever going into my head.
My birthday a few months ago, but no one, whether my friends, family, coworkers, I even let it on in FB, none wishes me. It's painful because I always wish them first. I know it sounds needy, but...it feels as if I'm forgettable.
Went silent for a month, and none reaches out. Have the negative thought that even if I hang myself and died, none would know unless I wake up from my grave and text them telling ,"How are you? By the way, I'm dead."
I know there's lots of others here who went through worse. I should be https://grateful.But it's still...suffocatingly lonely.