complexpostraumaticstressdisorder

Does any one else get angry at themselves for being angry about something that was done wrong - not by me but by someone close to/ related to me. But that wrong has a bad reflection on me or my family name. You get that angry you explode via a text or whatever. Then after feel guilty about getting angry then feeling you have to justify your reasons for getting angry. Almost apologising for feeling the way you did. Even though your conscious self tells you your anger is warranted. Even when you do get over that initial situation that it just leads into more anger and especially with your significant other. Old arguments come up regarding shit that should have already been dealt with (financial situation for example) and then instead of feeling supported you feel guilty that you have caused an argument with your significant other and you get the silent treatment after the argument but again feel that your anger at that particular situation is warranted also. Like a simple apology or I understand your frustration let’s work on this together, I am here for you etc. No just me, feels like it. Forever trapped in my own head. Add into the mix I took a hypo between situation one and two and now feel it’s all my fault.... 😠☹️😭 #DiabetesType1 #MentalHealth #complexpostraumaticstressdisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Hypoglycemia #anangryheadisalonelyhead

Specially the self hatred and dissociation and how it affects every day life. Did you also did horrible in school and get bored easily and seek new things to do and read but get bored anyway? And do you have a terrible memory and do you also only remember certain childhood memories?