hypermania

So I have bpd (diagnosed) and have had it suggested that I have adhd due to manic episodes. When I’m feeling “manic” or “hyper” I struggle to control my volume and become bouncy. I usually feel happy but unfocused during this time. I hear buzzing sounds snd everything is bright.
People (family/friends) very often shhhh me or ask me to calm down when I’m like this. For me this triggers my mood switch. I don’t feel like I control how I am when manic and being asked to calm down makes me feel as though I’m being judged or that I’m embarrassing. It hurts and I’ve highlighted this. I understand that shushing someone isn’t that bad but for me it represents “be normal” and I end up self hating and feeling a burden. These are my people I jus want them to accept happiness for me is extreme and my behaviour is a lot but it’s part of me!! #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #hypermania #ADHD #Judgement

I can see myself slipping
Down the corridor of insanity
Doors on either side
Beginning to slide open.
A light at the end,
Beckoning,
Beckoning,
“Closer my dear,
You are almost here.
What? Those doors? Oh,
Never mind them.
They are just the way to sanity.
No need to go there5
You’ve sold your soul
To me and I have
Come to claim what
Is mine.”

Dianne Lowe Breakfield

#Depression #Mania #hypermania #MentalHealthCare #Selfcare