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Can't stop pulling my hair. Got scared when I saw a flashing light. I left a message for my eye doctor but the stress of what could be overflowed into self destruction.

I feel better after talking about it. Just gotta focus on today. Right now. That's all.

If it is an eye thing it could help the neurologist (when I see him) figure out what's going on. Because I have a lot of MS like symptoms. I don't want MS I just want to feel better, no matter what it takes.

No matter the answer I know it will work out. It's just getting the answer...that is the challenge.

Wish me luck.

#Trichotillomania #Trich #MultipleSclerosis #mslikesymptoms #Spoonie


I've Been Gone Too Long (poem)

Tegan and Sara - Yellow (Official Music Video)

#MultipleSclerosis #MS #mslikesymptoms #chronicallyill #Spoonie

I’ve been gone too long

Voids stare back at me

Enough is enough; set me free

Being in this body is tiring

Enough is enough

Every day feels the same

Never changing, always something holding me back.

Going every part of nowhere

Only seeing what I want to see

Nothing can change what’s already begun

Even though I want it to change.

Too many years wasted

Only to find the truth in hell

Over the hill, right in front of me

Long has the fight lingered inside of me

Only to be snuffed by the anger and rage

Never again, never again!

Great minds never cease.


This poem was written from my bed as I was battling a menieres/neurological attack. I was fine one moment, then I was grabbing my head and throwing up in a bowl.

What the?

It’s frustrating, dealing with all of this. I’m strong and a badass but there are days when I don’t feel strong enough.

I have to remember that I am because it’s true. I need to be kinder to myself, nicer to myself. Because I’m worth it.

Tegan and Sara - Yellow (Official Music Video)

Stream/Download “Yellow": Tegan and Sara's New Album 'Crybaby' Out Oct 21st:

Multiple Sclerosis #MS #MultipleSclerosis #mslikesymptoms

Making the time

Understanding the pain

Learning a little each day

Time is everything

In case we lose it all

Playing with time

Lying to yourself

Endearing oneself to death.

Sighing with exhaustion

Crying tears of sadness

Loss of memories

Erosion of time

Righteous anger

Operating on fumes

Saying you're OK

Intend to make every moment count

Saying you're NOT OK.


This is another poem about my MS like symptoms.

Basically, I'm seeing a neuro in May. I'm not expecting good news. I have been dxed with Peripheral Neuropathy a long **** time ago. But now I have double visions, weakness, numbness on side from time to time, and ****ty cognitive symptoms. Oh and incontinence (so embarrassing). No matter what the news is, it's not exactly stellar. This is how I keep mental control.