sadlife

Lately, I’ve been feeling like I’m carrying a weight that just won’t lift. Not on my back, but in my chest and mind. It’s the kind of pressure that doesn’t just come from bills piling up or bank notifications. It’s the kind that slowly creeps into your thoughts, your sleep, and your self-worth.

Right now, I’m going through a financial crisis. And it’s not just about not having enough money—though that alone is terrifying. It’s about how deeply it’s affecting my mental health.

The Silent Struggle:

Every day feels like a battle. I wake up with this heavy feeling of anxiety. Sometimes it’s hard to breathe. Sometimes I’m just numb. I catch myself constantly doing mental math—how to stretch what little I have, how long I can delay this payment, how to explain my situation without sounding like I’ve failed.

The stress isn’t just emotional; it’s physical. My body aches. I don’t sleep well. My appetite is off. I’ve started isolating myself from people because it feels too hard to pretend I’m okay.

Guilt, Shame, and That Inner Critic:

The hardest part? The guilt. The shame. Feeling like I should have done things differently. That I made mistakes I can’t fix. My inner critic has been louder than ever, constantly reminding me of what I don’t have and what I should have done.

But I’m learning—slowly—that I’m not alone. And neither are you if you're feeling this too.

This Is Not Weakness:

We live in a world where financial success is tied to our self-worth. But I’ve come to understand that being broke doesn’t make me broken. Struggling doesn’t mean I’ve failed. Being vulnerable enough to admit that I’m not okay—that’s strength.

Mental health and finances are closely connected, and the topic is often overlooked. The anxiety, the depression, the hopelessness—they're real, and they matter.

What I’m Trying to Do:

I’m not writing this because I have all the answers. I don’t. But I’m trying. I’m reaching out more. I’m talking to a counselor. I’m journaling. I’m doing small things that remind me I still have control, like taking a walk outside or simply drinking enough water.

If you’re reading this and you’re in a similar place, I want you to know: that you’re not alone. Your feelings are valid. You are not your bank balance. And things can get better—even if right now, it doesn’t feel that way.

One Step at a Time:

Maybe you can’t fix everything today. That’s okay. Maybe today, all you can do is breathe, drink a glass of water, and remind yourself you’re still here. That matters.

I’m still in this. I don’t have a neat ending or solution yet. But I’m holding on to hope. And if you’re reading this, maybe you can too.

#sad #sadlife #suffering frombraintumour

Demons come in many forms, be it through the dark whispers in the night or the looming heaviness in the air in broad daylight. In other cases, it could be the voice of a lost loved one coaxing you. I've always been one to brush alongside the "dangers" in life. When you're so use to being abandoned, scorned, shunned and put "out of sight, out of mind", finding that Haven is hard. My Haven used to be in books, carried away on elaborate journeys, character defining moments and in a lot of cases, battles of wits and visualising the entireties until that too was breached and destroyed.

As time passes on, the languid touch of "just let go" became more and more appealing. It seemed like nothing was working, there wasn't anyone I trusted enough and due to being sent away to boarding school, making connections was more or less non-existent. Until I was 15, that concept hadn't changed in fact, things just got a whole lot worse. My biological mother wanted nothing to do with me, because I "stole" her "youth" and was adamant that I wanted to "rob' her of 'the love of her life". My older brother was removed from my life at an early age because our biological father used him as a punching bag.

How is it possible to put your faith, unconditional trust and loyalty in people when the ones who we're meant to protect you from harm are the very instigators that create more and more damaging and life-changing habits. Physical abuse fades after time... but emotional, mental and psychological abuse? It's a never ending nightmare

I always being crazy without wanting it to happen. for example My friends just telling me sad story very seriously and my face give a smile and my thought tell myself to stop smiling but more i tell myself to stop the more smile in my face act it so wierd if my friend think that im crazy when she dont kno i have bdp. It is embrassing for me to tell her im scare she dont want to be friend with anymore we have 15 years friendship i dont want just because my disorder my relationship broken. so sad. She is the only one friend i had. #sadlife

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

When you hope for the best but you only get the usual, be grateful you are not the worst.if you can't use a fake smile try using a poker face. #sadlife #sadnest #sadpeople