This post may not be liked by some people because of triggers so i’m going to try to explain to you guys why iv reached out to my local provider to section 5 me.

Why on earth, i think many people would say to me on other networks, so why?

My husband of 20 years deserves to have his wife back,
My eldest child can come off annual leave and get stronger again so he can get back into work as my mania is chronic at the moment.
My middle child 27, is desperately trying to sleep for work and he can’t focus in work because im really bad late at night and just snap. He never interrupts but im ashamed and it’s affecting our relationship and his own mental health.

My third child is struggling because she absorbs all this pressure. She does intervene and it ends up even worse, that’s not fair to her.

When your child tells you they don’t remember who mum was and they want her back is soul destroying to hear, but painfully true.

Today may not be a good day, the past 9 months have blended into a complete crisis and cycle of panic, mania, anger, sometimes delusional thoughts i’m shouting them all over the house!

I’m tired, they tired and as a family we have decided that having a 28 day release from the house, will really help me, get me seen by the professionals i clearly need and my family will no longer have to take on this horrendous pressure.

I am waiting on a telephone call, it’s not going to happen overnight and it’s bank holiday weekend, as soon as i can get some help, we will all benefit.

I’m 53 my blood pressure is dangerously high and i am constantly worried about having a stroke, or something bad is going to happen.

#MentalHealth #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #SchizoaffectiveDisorder
#samaritansuk

I’m lucky i have my family to support me, sometimes that’s not possible for people, Samaritans are there night or day and all volunteer lead, would be my first port of call other than my family 🗣️💪✨