tooyoung

I'm 34 years old. I was diagnosed with MS one week before my 31st birthday. I had to quit my last job in January 2019 because I couldn't provide them with a doctor's note explaining why I had missed so much work within the 90-day probation period. I didn't have insurance and I wasn't diagnosed yet.

I've since depleted the meager savings I had, couldn't afford to renew my lease and I now live with a married couple I know. I need help. I can't cook for myself, I don't keep up with bathing regularly, and the clutter in my room is so out of control that I dissociate daily because it's so overwhelming. Since I'm "ambulatory" social security doesn't think I'm disabled enough and said that I should be able to adjust to other work, though they won't tell me what other work they think I should be able to do. My last 4 jobs were in call centers. I'd really love to know what other work they think I could do that's easier than a call center.

My roommates: husband is the only person who works and has 2 jobs to be able to financially take care of household expenses. Wife is also disabled and has difficulty with keeping up with cleanliness around the house as well. I've asked a number of friends and even made posts on Facebook asking for help. No one is obligated to help me. There were some people who have offered to help but 1-2 days every 2-3 months isn't sufficient. I honestly wish I could just hire a nurse or something but would they even help me? I'm so young. I feel like they'd hear my age and go "You have to be at least 40 or bed-bound for us to work with you." Why does society as a whole thing that younger people can't be disabled? Why do people think that someone my age couldn't use the assistance if they're asking for it?!

I did my first vending gig in over a year today. I have a little button shop that I started in July 2019 to try to make some money. I think I'm on my 4th relaunch. My partner twisted their ankle yesterday so I had to load and unload the car by myself. The high was 83 today and the heat index pushed it to the mid 90s. I'm home now and my body is screaming. As much as I'd love to take a bath right now, I don't have the spoons to do anything except be in bed. How am I supposed to live like this? How am I supposed to function?

I finally have a hearing for my disability case coming up in August. I have heard from a local disability lawyer that if you're under 50, you have to do a lot more to prove that you can't work. They've already denied me twice. This is just so discouraging and dehumanizing.