artastherapy

…
…I'm saying goodbye to the people that I feel are real good at wasting my time
No regrets, baby, I just think that maybe
You go your way and I'll go mine
It's been a real good time
But you've got dark energy, something I can't unsee
And I've got to take care of myself
I've found a deeper well
…
.., I'm getting rid of the habits that I feel
Are real good at wasting my time
No regrets, baby, I just think that maybe
It's natural when things lose their shine
So other things can glow
I've gotten older, now I know
How to take care of myself
I've found a deeper well

When I was growing up
We had what we needed, shoes on our feet
But the world was as flat as a plate
And that’s okay
The things I was taught only took me so far
Had to figure the rest out myself
And then I found
I found a deeper well

#Music #Lyrics #artastherapy #MentalHealth

(Reworked version of “The Architect” by Kacey Musgraves)

Even something as small as each creature
Small but quite complex
Wondrous, divine
All different designs
Can I speak with the architect?

Just look at all of the people
Did we get here by grand design?
Were we devised?
Are we all a surprise
formed by random, chaotic things?

Are we thought out at all,
or paint thrown at a wall?
Is there anything that You regret?
I don’t understand
Are there blueprints or plans?
Can I speak to the architect?

Sometimes, I think about me
And wish I could make a request
Can I pray stuff away?
Am I shapeable clay?
Or is this as good as it gets?

One day you think that you’ve got this
This thing that we all call life
Then a wind from behind
carries ember and ash
and it burns your world to the ground

Is it thought out at all,
or just pain on a wall?
Is there anything that You regret?
I don’t understand
Are there blueprints or plans
Can I speak with the architect?

Sometimes, I think I’m too broken,
and maybe too hard to love
I’m in a strange state
and stuck in bad places
Can You help me make sense of it?

Does it happen by chance?
Is it all happenstance?
Do we have any say in this mess?
Is it too late to make some of it better?
Can I speak to the architect?

This life that we make is it random or fate?
Are we our own architects?
Is there an architect?

#artastherapy #Music #words #Lyrics #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth

#artastherapy

#artastherapy #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Relationships #Autism #ADHD #Grief #Anxiety #Depression #MentalHealth #LittleJoys

#artastherapy #Autism #ADHD #Anxiety #Depression #CPTSD #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #LittleJoys

i think of the beginning
and recall a flicker
that first came from You,
of life,
of beauty
of living, enjoying
creating

Somewhere, still in me
there’s a faint
light in the dark
i still hurt
i’m still confused
But there’s a child in there and
they still miss You

In my mind,
i’ve always been asking
for You to…
…hoping You would
stay
Now, i just hope that
the flicker does

For a time,
it felt like
there was already
nothing left

But in that moment,
near the end
You could barely speak
but said,

“I love you. I really do.”

Now, that
is what
I want to stay
At least until
we get the chance
to speak again

Our moment
kept us waiting,
was small,
brief

But I will keep it
A spark
A flicker in the dark
of life
of beauty
of love
between Us

#artastherapy #Relationships #Grief

This change came on fast
I don’t know how to feel
I do want to try

It’s human to want not to feel
It’s human to want to feel good
Human to feel ‘too much,’ ‘too often’

I ‘bit the hands that fed’ me
I ‘bit the hands’ that ‘needed’ me
I needed them.

This isn’t what I wanted
I suck at walking away
Hate having to walk away

Shouldn’t think “what might have been”
But this isn’t how I saw it
I wished too far

I wasn’t ready for this
Did I think I would be?!
Storm I was forced to face

Tried to be composed about it
Been such a fool about it
Always afraid to let you go

Sometimes to grow we grieve
All here, then gone
Roads eventually lead to an end

I’m struggling to see a future
I still feel so small
Facing backwards, I will never run free

Another year flies by
Then another…
and another…

It’s time…been time to let you go
I’ll find the courage after it hurts
I’ll know how, only after it hurts

Pieces of you always in me
At peace, something I’m not
But something I could be

#artastherapy #Relationships #Grief #MentalHealth #CPTSD