badmentalhealthday

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Worst Mental Health Day I’ve Had in Ages

Hello all, it’s been a hot minute since I’ve been on here. I’ve officially had the worst mental health day I’ve had in ages today, and it all began yesterday evening.

My best friend told me last night that it might be best if she and I not talk for a while. Her husband was angry with her, and told me it was probably a good idea if we wait until she gets things sorted out at home. (NOTE: I have never made a pass at her, and she, her husband, and I are all good friends, but typically it’s she and I who hang out together the most, though we’re always honest and sincere with each other and him if we do something, such as go to the movies together. He trusts me enough to know that I won’t take advantage of her.) I said okay, but then I started to worry, and all the typical worst case scenarios filled my head about the sudden state of our friendship. Things only got worse when I discovered that she unfriended me on Facebook, and her husband completely blocked me.

We had talked earlier this week about grabbing dinner together (all 3 of us hanging out and watching a movie), but for some reason yesterday he snapped and got angry with her. So here I am respecting her wishes and not texting her or anything, but instead waiting for the time when she feels like things have settled down before she texts me again.

However, my anxiety has been sky high with worst case scenarios, because a similar thing happened with another close friend of mine who ghosted me after being friends with me since he and I were in High School, and I’m terrified that this is going to happen again and I’m going to lose my best friend.

I had a panic attack in the middle of the night last night because of it, and haven’t been able to shake this constant worry and fear, and anxiety. I’ve felt uneasy all day and have just felt like crying. #BipolarDisorder #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #badmentalhealthday #worry

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Insecurities

Whenever I say I'm having a bad mental health day I feel like everyone wants to avoid me and disappear. I need someone to talk to. #badmentalhealthday #Depression

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Get depressed easily

I get depressed easily idk maybe it was inevitable I was going to have a bad mental health day. I have been so busy today that I look at my kitchen full of dishes and I felt down about myself. I have been called supermom ...well that was a lie #Depression #badmentalhealthday

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#RealTalk

So... I'm not okay. I'm honestly barely hanging on, and every day that the virus spreads and I have to be in self-quarantine, that grip slips just a little more. And I know I'm not alone in this. I know we are all struggling to hold on, to keep going and be strong. And I usually am a decent pillar of strength, should anyone need to borrow some. But today, instead of a pillar, I feel like a toothpick. I'm gonna need to borrow some strength and support from whomever is willing to share. Please, help me get through today. Thank you in advance. ❤️ #CheckInWithMe #Roughday #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #needhelp #badmentalhealthday

31 comments