BeAware

I was in first grade when I become extremely ill. It was flu season, so the doctors assumed that’s what I had. I continued to get worse and worse as the days went on. I had a fever ranging between 103 to 107 and it never would break. My tongue was bright red. My skin was broke out in a crazy rash all over my body. my skin was peeling off in large chunks for no apparent reason. My lymph nodes were unbelievably swollen. We continued to go back to the hospital. Due to the lack of knowledge and education on the disease I had, it took weeks to finally figure out what was going on. I Spent my birthday and Christmas in the hospital, which absolutely sucked, but we made the best of it! Crazy enough the only reason I was even taken out to the hospital was because of my grandma’s dog. She followed me everywhere and would not leave my side! I guess you could say that this little old schnauzer saved my life.

I am posting this because it needs to be talked about. Kawasaki Disease may be rare, but people need to know about it! It has had lasting effects on me and it continues to cause me problems. Because of this disease I have an extremely weak immune system, I get infections around my heart when I get even the slightest bit dehydrated, I am not able to stay out in the sun too linty because it makes me sick. There are no proven lasting side effects of Kawasaki disease, but I really feel like if I hadn’t gotten this disease I would not have so many health issues.

I contracted this disease when I was 6. I am now almost 21. I am one of the 19 kids out of every 100,000 that was diagnosed with Kawasaki Disease. I will continue to fight in order to spread awareness. #KawasakiDisease #KawasakiSyndrome #BeAware #Survivor

Today I woke up and my body was weak, empty, cold and cringed up from crying so much. My head was under my covers where oxygen was lacking and all I could breathe in was my own air I was breathing out. Tears kept pouring out of me like they had been waiting for the first one to fall so they all could follow along. I’m trapped inside the body of somebody I don’t want to be. I want to be happy and care free and full of life again. I want to run around without shoes and forget what I feels like to carry demons on your shoulder and monsters in your mind. I want to forget about the bad people can do and just focus on the good. I want to be myself and not care what anybody thinks. I want to CONTROL myself and not let my emotions and illness control me, or medications or opinionated people. At the end of today, I put on makeup, I got dressed, showered, brushed my teeth, and I went out and told myself to go or else I’d drown in my mind. Sometimes all we need is ourselves and we don’t even realize that. Everything we seek can be found within our own bodies. #BeAware #Loveyourelf #PickYourselfUp #Selflove #seekhelp