darkside

these past few days i was drag to the darkest time of my life. i feel empty, feels like no one cares, no one can understand, no one loves me. i tell my condition to yeye, the one ond only friend that i believed to share my dark side. yesterday was my birthday and now i wanna share her wishes in my birthday , her words make me realize that acrually i am loved. here her words

"guess there's nothing much to talk neither wishes about, you seems fine by yourself, for today atleast, got lots of gift and wishes than you've ever gotten before, right? felt nice? or best? isn't it beyond ur expectation? just wanted to say, there's more people than u think who cares enough to spent their time to celebrate your day of birth, spent their money to buy you a gift, thinking 'bout what to say even tho they really had nothing to say. Do you even know, sometimes, or many time, you just so hard on yourself that you dig you own grave? Not necessarily needed but seriously, learn not to be so hard on urself, that's what makes you who you are today. Nothing easy, i know that more than words can tell, just, u know, wakes up in the morning, take a bath, drink a glass of water or even juice, say hello to ur friend with a smile, take a walk while listening to music, laugh even at the smallest things, or you can even laugh at ur darkest thought, they're nothing but toxic, learn that they wont take you anywhere but your on grave. learn that ur happiness fade bcs ur darkest mind. i'm not a person who should saying things like this, but i've learned my lesson, if that even a right word to use. stays with things that brightent ur day, stay away by the things that destroy ur day. i'm happy with myself and my life right now no matter what happened and what will happend, and i wish that you'll be happy with yourself and how ur life turn out to be and enjoy ur days without being drag to the dark side. just a small wish with a long paragraph as you wanted and what you needed but with the deepest heart. happy birthday, to the girl who is (might) still lost, your path is there, you just haven't seen it yet"

and i promised i will be happy no matter what this cruel world give to me