Intimacy with an Invisible Disease
I was having a conversation with a family member and the topic of sex came up. The question that was asked was since the progression of #EhlersDanlosSyndrome how is my husband and I sex life. To be honest with us, our sex life hasn't changed as much. We are still very much attracted to each other and the thought of pleasure still can drive us both insane with lust and passion, yet we have had to be more careful about certain positions and things. I have always been the type of girl to listen to her body. I guess you can say I'm very in tune on what and how I feel. As time has gone on and I am now more reliant on my wheelchair, our sex life has become more intriguing. I learned that body pillows and wedge pillows help me a lot with my hips. My hips dislocated a lot so having the support really helps. We learn to listen to each other more when it comes to being comfortable having sex. My husband is very sweet and always ask how to accommodate me to where we both can still enjoy each other before the diagnosis. I've read and heard many other Zebras struggle with intimacy with their mates to the point there is separation and some times divorce. I hate to hear stories about that yet it is all about clear communication with each other. Let each other know how the other is feeling about intimacy. I would even suggest a sex counselor (not sure of the technical title) to help inform how to be able to still have a healthy sex life despite our disabilities and illnesses. I can say for me, I'm not worried at all when it comes to love making with my husband as time goes forward. I know with us having that clear communication and brainstorming together that whatever the next phase is, we can still honor our love for each other and still have a beautiful sex life that can last us forever. A few tips from me would be to have the talk with your spouse and be completely honest with what you need and want from them. Research different pillows that can help you feel more comfortable in the bedroom. I found that wedge pillows are great for the hips. I would even recommend watching some videos that may help spark some inspiration. I still love be sexy for not only myself but my husband and I don't allow being in my wheelchair to stop that. I still love to wear my sexy lingerie. It helps keep the spice in our lives and not worry about a dislocation or anything health related. It becomes our time to just be together and in the moment. I hope this helps inspire any couples that may feel like they have lost all hope in the love making department. Keep fighting!!