I'm 46 years. Still have no one to share my live with. I no longer have my parents. Not have any friends anymore. Haven't dated since I was 30 years old. I've been through so many things in the pass few years. I'm living with chronic pain due to multiple car accidents that have been in the last 10 years. Along with depression and complex post-traumatic stress disorder. Relocated to a different borough of New York City. And at 46 years old I have to reset my entire life due to so much loss and so much time trying to heal and recover from all the car accidents that have been in along with Sandy Storm it which I lost everything. And at this time of my life I'm just really tired of being alone and doing everything on my own learning things by try and error because there's no support system around me to help me navigate through the challenges that I'm faced with. I'm no longer have the mental or the emotional strength to push through any longer. Right now as I'm sending this out I'm dealing with and struggling with some unfinished family matters that I need support in and I'm struggling to find a lawyer to help me navigate through. It's so hot reaction and so overwhelming and so I am so angry I so tired of fighting things on my own that I'm not familiar with I don't have tools for I've never experienced in my life for the first time. and I reached out to so many different places to get help and it's like I'm just going in a circle and no support system nothing's coming up nothing's happening nothing's moving. and it's affecting me to the point where I'm not sleeping at night and it's time passes by the more more frustrating the more things are going on on the other end of things and I really need to get to the bottom of stuff for my own peace of mind and to close this door in my life. I don't know what to do I have days where I just lay in bed all day long just sleeping barely eating anything just sleeping watching TV and back asleep again. I need help I need assistance I need directions I need a support system in a family of my own. But how do I do this how do I get past what's going on inside of me how do I fix me before it gets any worse and I end up doing harm to myself or maybe even to others because of the pain and hurt and the tightness that I'm going through? how do you get through the ups and downs that you've never experienced or was even taught to deal with in your life how do you get through on your own by yourself with no support? I am tired of being on my own and being lonely. sometimes I look back at my life and I think I should have made different choices I should have followed the crowd and said it woke it up in the crowd maybe things will be different from me maybe I will be happy maybe I would have all that I wanted. these are the thoughts that go through my mind sometimes . sometimes I'm able to look look at my achievements and my in spite of the fight or struggle that I had to endure in my life.
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