managingmood

I've been struggling recently. The need to self harm, thoughts of suicide. I confided this to my wife and one of our best friends, went to my counselling session, and carried on with life. Struggling everyday, as you do. I'd even resorted to elastic bands around my wrists I could flick against myself so I wouldn't cut.

Jump to this past Sunday. And mh wife takes me out for a boba tea. But drops a bombshell on the way. She, and our friends, have organised for me to get a new tattoo. Because they know that I use getting them as the self harm release. And I know have a 3/4 complete forearm piece (pictured), and I'm a big guy, I stand 7ft tall my forearm is large.

Just goes to show, when youre feeling unloved and at your absolute lowest, those closest to you still give a damn. I'm so fucking lucky to have these people in my life.

#Depression #Anxiety #CPTSD #managingmood

I've just had the 1st anniversary of my dads unexpected death (1st Nov) and he was my main supportor. He knew how to help me and understood me from my early struggles until my last hospital admission just weeks before he died. I want to grieve him, but I'm scared if I do, I will spiral and won't be able to pull myself back without him here. He was my biggest advocate of self help and recovery. I feel like if im allowed to be sad, I may let him down. #BipolarAwareness #Grief #managingmood #Support #Caregivers