notcleaning

As of now the dept of health says I can return to work Friday., so of course I spiked a fever tonight. Have until 1 pm tomorrow to get rid of it. I literally don’t think I can stay home another week or two. I am maxed out on dvds, books, working on little projects for work. I am positive I am not manic though because this place is trashed! That is actually a personal victory, because my spouse says I love when you are manic, the house gets so clean. #notcleaning #missmypatients !

Maybe its the lock down beginning to get to me, but I seriously am looking forward to the apocolypse because I am fed up of feeling guilty about having an unclean house!! When the apocolypse comes, my dusty, dirty house will be the same as everyone elses!!

I work part time, but am classed as a casual person so I have no income. I have had to get another temporary job, which I have to work more hours for less money. Working with fibro can be hard any time, but now I am in a care home doing unit hosting and it is really draining me. Yet every day I come home and I am so knackered I cant face cleaning; so today after 5 days on, on my first day off I am pushing myself to clean as much as I can because I feel guilty.

My OH is supportive, but he doesn't really help, so it all falls on my shoulders. We have a German Shepherd as well, (short haired thankfully!!) which adds to the "dirtyness" and all I ever do is look at the mess and feel so guilty!! Is it just me?

#Fibromyalgia #Anxiety #mentalhealth #Depression #Guilt #Cleaning #notcleaning #tired #screwit