That’s how I feel as my therapist explains how there’s still a version of five year old me inside myself that’s hurt and scared by my fathers angry verbal outbursts. “But I was never hit” “he said worse to my older brothers” “it happened a long time ago it’s not important” all these thoughts and more swirl in my head as she talks. I was the baby girl, the favorite. My older brothers and even my father consistently reminding me how much easier my childhood was compared to theirs. So what right do I have to struggle? Nothing was ever that bad.
My therapist wants me to try taking the mountian of a baby step to accept that my experiences are valid and they were hurtful. But, I can’t? I panick when I think about it and the internal script of invalidating comments just gets louder and louder.

#Depression #Anxiety #ADHD #validation #invalidation #Therapy #DBT #parentalverbalabuse