I'm sure many can relate to the above title. If anyone else is like me, you have spent a decent amount of time trying to pinpoint which diagnosis is the catalyst to the rest. Because then, if you could just treat that ONE... the rest would go away, right?

Like with a physical illness that causes multiple symptoms, it's about finding the MAIN culprit, if you find that...treat that...it fixes the rest.

Of course, I've found that things are never that cut and dry, black and white, etc. with mental illness.
I've spent the last few weeks stuck on the question of what my primary issue could be. Is the ADHD causing the depression and anxiety? Or is the anxiety and depression causing the ADHD? or is it actually the chronic insomnia that leads to sleep deprivation that's causing the ADHD, depression, and anxiety? Or is the depression causing the insomnia which fuels the ADHD and anxiety??
Or is there another diagnosis that they've missed ? Like my ADHD that wasn't diagnosed until my early 30s.

For example the chronic insomnia that I've had since High School. Is it straight up insomnia? Or something else? Like Delayed Sleep Disorder? Where my internal circadian wake sleep cycle is naturally hours off from neurotypicals, and society norms. Example, I don't naturally get tired until btwn 4-6am. Or somniphobia (literally the fear of sleep) because I know that when I do sleep for 2 hours or longer, my brain seems to literally shutdown. and rebooting it is a 6 hour process sometimes. So could the root of a lot of my stuff be caused by the insomnia or another sleep disorder?

And the major depression can cause everything to be worse but at the same time, everything else could be the cause of the debilitating depression.

Add in the anxiety, panic disorder, agoraphobia, and all those issues that could be the cause of, or caused by, one of the others, and it becomes a million piece puzzle. With pieces missing. It becomes the equivalent of the question, 'which came first, the chicken or the egg?'

And sometimes it feels like just too much.

#ADHD #Insomnia #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Depression #PanicDisorder #Anxiety #Agoraphobia