I just spent 6 hours at the hospital with a friend who was struggling after a panic attack and after $20 parking fees, snacks for us while we waited plus gas money....I got home I asked myself,
Why the fuck do I help everyone else when they struggle but no one helps me?
Why am I the "mum"?
Why am I the responsible one?
Why cant I be the one in hospital getting someone else to hold me up and pull me through?
Why do I care about so many people who dont care about me?
Why cant someone else hunt for a fucking vending machine cause I want a cookie?
Why cant I have a support person to help me explain when I'm so anxious I cant put words together??
Why do I let these people take advantage of my friendship?