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You can’t avoid getting older but you can avoid getting old. #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #FamilyAndFriends #Relationships #MentalHealth

There are many things I fear, but one occurring fear is getting old before my time. 63 is not old. I purposely choose do things which might be a bit scary and out of my comfort zone.

I don’t mind getting older but I never want to be boring. Life is such an adventure. May we always find joy in the moments that matter and may we never get too old for face painting.

What keeps you young?

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It’s beginning to look like Christmas #Hope #Depression #Anxiety #Christmas #Relationships #FamilyAndFriends #MentalHealth

Christmas can be a time of many mixed emotions. For me too. Once if the best ways I have found to successfully navigate the season is by giving to others.

On Christmas we will have all sorts of people around for lunch. Family, people on their own and whoever else shows up. It will be a feast.

Each year my church gives away almost a thousand Christmas presents to children in hospital, children of prison inmates, children whose Mums are in refuges and so many more. This is what will go to a children’s hospital. So proud of my congregation.

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Christmas is coming #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #Christmas #FamilyAndFriends #Relationships #MentalHealth

Christmas is getting closer. Here in Australia there are some predictive things that generally occur in the lead up to Christmas. There will be more car accidents, domestic violence, self harm incidents and financial stress.

This can be attributed to extreme heat, alcohol, having to see people you generally avoid and the biggest factor is unrealistic expectations about what Christmas will be like.

As a Pastor, Christmas for me is mostly about Jesus, but consumerism has led us to believe Christmas means everything will be smooth sailing and fun, and everything will be perfect.

Perhaps it’s time to lower our expectations and if it’s all wonderful, we can be pleasantly surprised.

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Beauty in the darkness #Depression #Hope #Relationships #FamilyAndFriends #Anxiety #CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth

I went in a cave this week. Which is a big deal because I am quite claustrophobic. Inside the cave the guide shone a torch against a wall and I was amazed at the beauty there.

It made me reflect on some of the most difficult times in my life. Although it wasn’t easy to see at the time but with the benefit of hindsight I saw beauty in those days.

The beauty of family and friends who fought for my health. The beauty of friends around the world who sent messages of encouragement. The beauty of hope God have me. The beauty of others going through dark days who invited others into their dark days as well as the good days.

What beauty have you seen lately?

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The best things in life are not things. #Depression #Anxiety #Relationships #FamilyAndFriends #MentalHealth

We are constantly bombarded with advertising promising products and services that are guaranteed to make us happy, popular or beautiful. Some may help us but the truth is the best things in life are not things.

The most important and valuable aspects of life are intangible. It’s faith, friends, moments, laughter and of course family.

Two of my Grandchildren got a pet rabbit last week. “Benji the rabbit” has really won their hearts!!!

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Monday thoughts

I don’t know what it is, but I’m full of thoughts and feelings today. First off, for me it feels like my life has been one big test and every person has entered my life and left have been lessons. And for those that have stayed, they’ve either redirected me in some way or made me question things and myself. I’ve either learned something or was left broken. Second, yesterday I decided to look in on Instagram after being off of it for the last four months. The first thought that I had was that I was really behind on here. Since most of the people I follow are people I know in real life, it’s as if I’m seeing them from the same stance as I do in real life: from a distance. I know that I will always have opportunities to make friends (and I take them as they come), this was an experience that made me realize that my friend group has really gotten smaller. From a standpoint, I do understand that I’m not that same person I was a few months ago, let alone last year, but these realization that I’ve been having are both enlightening and saddening. #MentalHealth #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #FamilyAndFriends

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I woke up feeling sadness from yesterday’s therapy session.

My therapist sessions are usually pretty decent. I never really experience extreme sadness afterwards. I would feel relief inside instead. But there has been a couple of things that I find are concerning. For example she was talking to her dog during my session. And it felt like some of my time was used up on her pet.

Then during our last session she offended me when I explained to her about a copycat in my family who has been pursuing every business endeavor I pursue. Whom has also copied my creative content on social media. I told my therapist that I don’t like when she does that especially since she has family support. And I am considered the black sheep who has to work hard to build a solid following online.

I went on to explain to my therapist that my cousin has an advantage over me. And how I did not understand why she’s mimicking everything that I do.

Including her author headshot she did the same exact pose I did in mine while wearing the same hairstyle. The therapist blew me off and said that it’s a form of flattery. But it isn’t to me especially if she copies every single thing that I do.

I love being unique and having individuality is important to me. Another thing my therapist asked me was, “Am I feeling some jealousy towards the cousin?” Now this is what really made me upset. I felt that the therapist was no longer being there for me. Because one thing that I absolutely despise is people who have a jealousy problem.

Also how would that even make sense if my concern is over the fact that she is copying me?? I want to just break up with this therapist and possibly find another or just do support groups.
Because I was telling my therapist how proud I was of myself for not letting the copycat stop me from doing what I was doing. Because I was on the verge of giving up. I told my therapist that I was able to reduce my stress and anxiety by journaling and dancing to some Michael Jackson.

Because I had discovered that the copycat had stolen yet another idea of mine only 5 days before my therapy session was scheduled. I had to figure out a way to calm down and to let it go. I was proudly sharing with my therapist how I needed a therapy session bad during that time but I managed to find a way to overcome that painful situation.

But after the session I had with her yesterday she didn’t make me feel good about cheering myself up anymore. She made me feel bad because she accused me of being jealous of my copycat! And now instead of waking up with a stretch and a smile like an actress from a Folgers commercial. I am waking up with sadness and a scowl. #Anxiety #MentalHealth #Trauma #Loneliness #FamilyAndFriends #Depression

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I’m not doing well at all.

I’m feeling terrible. I’m angry, I feel hurt, all of the above. For the last few days, I’ve been having “family dysfunction” dreams and yet again, my mom wants to help. I’m given all types of advice, sometimes I really don’t want her advice, I just want her to listen. She brings up that the man of the house is embarrassed by my words when I called him out and that sent me over the edge. Addiction aside, he had time to get help, I even asked him and he said no. I get told that I’m living in the past, maybe I am. I get told that I need to get out more, and I will. I’m told that I have a decent life because of him. And yet he still goes through my things when I’m not home. Yes I don’t want a relationship with him, and it’s because it’s a dead end most of the time. I feel like I have to keep it going. I’m sick of everything and everyone. I can do therapy, I can talk this out, but the pain is still there. And I know it will still be there.LET ME BE ANGRY! LET ME CRY! LET ME SCREAM! I feel like if I cut this man off completely, I’m in the wrong. I’m just in a lot of emotional pain right now. #MentalHealth #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #FamilyAndFriends

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News break #Depression #PTSD #Hope #FamilyAndFriends #Anxiety #MentalHealth

I am naturally curious. I love to stay informed. However the world events at the moment are extremely disturbing and triggering. So, I am going to restrict my news access to reading online news, once a day. I haven’t watched tv news for about a decade for the same reason.

If the media starts broadcasting more “good news” I will read more. Somehow I don’t think they will. So I going public with this resolution so I am more accountable.

Want to join me in taking a break?

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The benefits of laughter. #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #FamilyAndFriends #laughter #MentalHealth

One of the best thing about being a Grandparent is the opportunity to be silly. Sometimes I will day to my 7 year old and 9 year old Granddaughters, “Guess what I saw yesterday?” I will then tell them I saw a “tree” or something equally mundane.

The looks on their faces is priceless. They have no idea whether to laugh or pray for me. The simplicity of laughter in battling mental health should not be overlooked.

Watching a good comedy is so good for my mental health!

What makes you laugh out loud?

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