Waitinggame

Appointment day. Really nervous. I’ve been back and forth with ENT for the last 18+ years and every time X surgery is meant to solve it and then the worst-case circumstance of Y happens. Finally getting told how my hearing is doing as well. Probably a bit of a trauma-related anxiety as when I got bad news last time my ex broke up with me within the hour of telling them. I know my partner wouldn’t do that, but having had something happen once means that the fear of it happening again is always somewhat there, regardless of any differences or specifics.

Also have my blood test tomorrow. Last one was abnormal & WBC was on the lower side of normal despite being ill (normally the opposite happens), and having had a quite low WBC before (which landed me seriously ill in hospital) the anxiety is there. I’m sure it will be fine, it’s just again a trauma response.

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