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I'm having a panic attack again and I cannot imagine another 2 weeks like this I literally cannot do this like actually genuinely I cannot do this i can't I literally can't I wanna die I can't do this I can't keep doing this everyone has been fucked up I can't do it. Remember when I was talking about how much physical pain I'm in and how it will worsen when these exams start? Yeah, now another problem has happened. I got a random dental problem 2 days ago and it's not going away. The pain from it is literally unbearable. I have to deal with my whole body being in excruciating pain all the fucking time and then also do the most pain inducing activities that will make my pain literally intolerable and then a new pain happens literally 2 days before my exams start. I was on my fucking limit when it comes to physical pain. Now the limit has been Crossed beyond a point I didn't even know existed. I'm literally fucking dying I can't do this I fucking can't I would rather die I literally fucking can't. Tomorrow is the fucking exam. Tomorrow. And then after that this shit is gonna go on for over 2 weeks. I can't imagine doing this for more than 2 days. I literally can't. The new tutor is not helping in the slightest, only giving me more to worry about. Honestly I wanna such terrible things about her. She is literally making my life hell instead of help like she's paid to do. This woman is adding more fire. And I have literally no one else. Everyone in the house is sick and having their own issues and trying to deal with them so literally no one cares about me and the agony I'm dealing with and I'm so fucking lonely and exhausted to my core. I know this whole thing sounds dramatic because I don't know how to word it properly. I'm definitely deleting this in a bit anyway. My mind is so crowded right now I just needed to get like 10 of the 100000 worries going on in my head down somewhere. I don't know what to do or where to go. I can't do this. This is a hell I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy. My luck is genuinely cursed and I don't care if this is pessimistic or whatever. It's the truth. Life always manages to make me struggle 10000x extra than what's needed. God please just make this new problem go away soon please I can't keep doing this I'm so done. Won't even ask for advice this time at this point. I know there's no point. I've literally done and tried everything already. Even then, if U do think of something that U think maybe I haven't done before, then let me know I guess. I'm so sleep deprived and done with my life.
#MentalHealth #Anxiety #ChronicPain #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PanicAttacks