Loneliness

What I CAN'T Always Choose
1 Which feelings show up-----feelings can show up without me choosing them
2 How other people react----I can't control what another person says or does
3 How strong a feeling is at first------sometimes a feeling can feel stronger than I expected
4 How quickly a feeling passes-----some feelings settle quickly, others take more time
5 How other people feel-----I can't choose how another person feels
6 What has already happened------I can't change what has happened, but I can choose what I do now

All feelings are ok, all actions are not. I can notice my feelings, look after myself, & choose what I do next.

The Best Exercise for Every Health Problem
Walking-----lowers blood pressure
Yoga-----reduces anxiety
Cycling----improves health heart
Swimming----relieves joint pain
Plank---eases back pain
Strength Training----regulates blood sugar
Pilates----improves posture
Squat----supports knee health
Shadow boxing---boosts circulation
Running----combats depression
Dancing-----improves brain health
Climbing---strengthens bones

Signs Someone with an Invisible Illness is Struggling
1 They're quieter or more withdrawn then usual
2 They say they're fine but seem completely exhausted
3 They cancel plans they were genuinely looking forward to
4 They struggle to keep up with everyday responsibilities
5 They use humor to hide how bad they're feeling
6 They have less energy to respond to messages or socialize
7 They start losing interests in things they normally enjoy
8 They struggle to find the energy for basic self-care

Don't Let People
live in your head rent-free
shame your sensitivity
steal your peace
make you doubt yourself
protect your peace
break your boundaries
ruin your day
minimise what you're carrying
define your worth

Healthy vs Unhealthy Coping Skills---------What helps you heal vs what hurts you more. Coping skills are the tools you use to deal with stress, emotions, & challenges

Healthy Coping Skills
Talk about your feelings-----sharing helps you feel understood & lighter
Take care of your body-----sleep well, eat well, & move your body
Express yourself-----write, draw, sing, or create anything that helps you release emotions
Focus on what you can control----let go of what you can't change & take action on what you can
Spend time in nature-----fresh air & sunshine can calm your mind & left your mood
Connect with supportive people----good friends & family remind you that you're not alone
Practice gratitude-----notice the little things that are going well
Do relaxation techniques-----deep breathing, stretching, or meditation can reduce stress
Set realistic goals----small steps lead to big achievements
Be kind to yourself----you're doing your best & that's enough

Unhealthy Coping Skills
Ignore your feelings----pushing them away makes them stronger
Overeating or Undereating-----using food to cope can harm your body & mood
Avoiding problems-----avoiding only makes problems bigger & harder to handle
Negative self-talk---------being to hard on yourself lowers your confidence
Isolating yourself----staying away from others can increase loneliness & stress
Using substances-----drugs or alcohol may give temporary relief but cause long-term harm
Excessive Screen Time-----to much scrolling can increase anxiety & drain your energy
Holding in emotions-----bottle up feelings & they may explode
Procrastination-----putting things off creates more stress & worry
Comparing yourself to others------it steals your joy & makes you feel "not enough"

A reflection on memory, identity, and the longing to feel alive.

I wrote this while exploring some feelings around memory, identity and emotional disconnection. Writing it was unexpectedly cathartic, and I wondered whether any of these experiences might resonate with others.

I’d love to hear your thoughts. ❤️

The Rooms Inside Me

I have lived so many different lives.

Sometimes I wonder where they have all gone. Where the people I used to be have disappeared to, and whether they are still somewhere inside me, waiting to be found.

I carry them all, I suppose. Every version of myself. Every life I’ve built, every person I’ve loved, every place I’ve called home. And yet, so much of it feels inaccessible to me now. As though there are rooms inside myself that have been locked for years, and I’ve forgotten where I left the keys.

I know those rooms exist. I know they must, because they made me who I am. But I cannot always remember what it felt like to live inside them.

Today, I ordered breakfast.

It was something ordinary. Something I used to share with someone I loved a long time ago, in another life. I hadn’t thought much about it when I ordered it. In fact, I’ve noticed that I often choose this same meal when I’m feeling particularly low.

But today, something happened.

For a moment, I felt it.

Not a memory exactly. Not an image or a particular moment in time. More like a familiar smell that suddenly transports you somewhere you had forgotten existed.

I felt the warmth of that life.

The richness of it.

And for one fleeting moment, I remembered what it was like to feel connected to my own existence.

Then came the grief.

Not because I wanted that life back. Not because I wanted to be that person again. But because I remembered how it felt to be alive in a way that I struggle to feel now.

And I realised how much I miss that feeling.

I have spent so many years learning how to survive inside my own mind. Learning to carry things that are difficult to explain, even to the people closest to me. Learning to be my own companion, my own advocate, my own source of reassurance.

There is a particular loneliness in living an experience that you cannot adequately describe.

In knowing that something is happening inside you, something profound and consuming, and having no way of making another person truly understand.

Eventually, you stop trying.

You accept the isolation as the price of being who you are.

But lately, something has changed.

The loneliness has become something more frightening.

Because somewhere along the way, I think I began losing my connection not only to other people, but to myself.

I move through my days. I work. I talk. I make decisions. I do the things that make up a life.

But sometimes it feels as though I am standing behind glass, watching myself exist.

I am there, but I cannot quite reach myself.

And perhaps the most frightening part is the thought that this might be all there is. That I might spend the rest of my life searching for a feeling of belonging, not just in the world, but within my own skin.

I don’t know exactly why I am this way.

There are diagnoses, explanations, pieces of a puzzle that have accumulated over the years. But none of them has ever quite explained what it feels like to be me.

And I am tired.

Tired of trying to explain something I barely understand myself. Tired of being my own champion every morning. Tired of carrying an invisible world that nobody else can see.

But today, for a little while, I found a way back.

I felt something I thought I had lost.

And perhaps that is why I am writing this.

Because I don’t want all these experiences to remain locked away inside me. I don’t want the richness of the lives I’ve lived, or the suffering I’ve endured, to disappear into places I can no longer reach.

I want to give them form.

I want to turn something invisible into something that can be seen. Something that can be held, understood, perhaps even recognised by someone who has never met me.

I want to make something beautiful from the things that have hurt me.

Not because the suffering needs to be justified.

But because I am tired of letting it be the only thing that speaks.

And perhaps, somewhere in the process of finding the words, I might begin to find myself again.

Perhaps the rooms inside me are not empty.

Perhaps they have simply been waiting for me to open the doors.

And perhaps I do not need to remember every life I have lived to know that they are all still part of me.

For now, I want to begin here.

With a feeling.

With a memory.

With the warmth of a breakfast from another lifetime.

And with the quiet hope that somewhere beneath all this disconnection, there is still a richness to being alive.

One that I might learn to feel again.

#MightyPoets #MentalHealth #ChronicIllness

I'm currently sitting on the edge of my sofa bed at my parents' house in Cornwall, with tears in my eyes. Just a few days ago, I was in Glasgow, living with my partner of almost five years.

We had been working on my website together. She was kissing me, telling me how proud she was of the progress I'd made. Later that day, we were making love and telling each other we loved each other. We were making plans for Christmas, talking about getting married and looking at houses.

Just two days later, she was looking me in the eye and telling me she didn't love me anymore.

I honestly cannot begin to describe what that did to me. I experienced the biggest autistic meltdown I've ever had. I was screaming, had to be restrained, and much of what happened afterwards is a blur. I still feel as though I'm waiting to wake up and discover it was all a nightmare.

Now I'm back in Cornwall, living in a small annexe at my parents' house. No partner, no home of my own, no friends, no job and no real direction in life.

Perhaps one of the hardest things is that I simply cannot understand how this happened. How can someone be telling you they love you, making love to you and talking about your future together, and then just two days later say they don't love you anymore? I keep going over everything in my head, trying to find an explanation or something I missed. I don't know whether she had been feeling this way for a long time or whether something changed. I just cannot make sense of it.

I've always struggled with relationships, largely because of my autism and the anxiety and overthinking that come with it. From the beginning, I was terrified that the relationship would eventually end because of something I'd said or done.

Looking back, I think that fear may have put a strain on things. For example, when she became upset, she needed space and wanted to be left alone. But I found that incredibly difficult because I would become consumed by thoughts about what she was thinking and whether she was going to leave me. I now torture myself thinking about all the times I should have given her the space she asked for. I feel as though my fear of losing her may have contributed to losing her.

I've also struggled to find work and to make a life for myself. I honestly don't feel as though I understand how to 'do life' in the way other people seem to. I've never had a particularly strong support network, and relationships have been the only times I've really felt that I wasn't alone.

I'm nearly 42, and I cannot bear the thought of spending the rest of my life without someone to share it with. I want the ordinary things that most people probably take for granted: someone to hold hands with, cuddle, talk to, come home to and make plans with. I even feel lonely when I'm with my own family.

I'm struggling with this so badly that I've been having thoughts about not wanting to be alive. I've seen my doctor and he’s already put me on diazepam, but I honestly don't know where to go from here.

I don't know what I'm going to do now.

Hi, my name is Oatmealdust. I'm curious about ways people cope with the loneliness of sever mental health issues. I feel so detached from the rest of society. like I’m a cricket chirping into the void.

#MightyTogether #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #SchizoaffectiveDisorder

Hi, my name is Elena. I’m new here. I’m looking for genuine friends and empathetic people who understand what it's like to feel lonely or go through deep emotional pain. I want to build supportive connections, share our stories, and be here for each other through hard times. If you need a friend who will listen without judgment, please feel free to send me a private message. Let's support each other.
#Depression #loneliness #selfharm #selfharmrecovery #peersupport #mentalhealth #relationships

I started a new job last week and I really don’t like it. We desperately need the money so I have to stick it out but I feel like I am sacrificing my mental health by being there. I’m depressed, anxious and lonely. I feel stuck.

I’m struggling with recovery from my eating disorder. I left residential 3weeks ago. I was doing really well there and had hope but since being home I feel like I’ve lost all the positivity I had gained. My behaviors are back. My negative thoughts are back and I’m spiraling back down into the ed. I started a new job last week and it sucks. I’m so depressed, anxious and lonely. I don’t know how to get out of this hole.

Hi everyone. I'm lonely & life's hard. Y'all look kind. I need kind. #BPD #PTSD