Bipolar 1 Disorder

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Double cancer survivor. Bipolar1 with severe depression with reoccurring psychotic features.

I just need some help get these bad thoughts out of my head and not feel like a failure or worthless. I beat can we twice very bad chemo treatments. Why can’t I beat this bipolar crap. I NEED HELP AND SUPPORT NOW PLEASE. I am a live in caregiver for a quad amputee and I feel like I’m failing him. I’m staying in my bedroom most of the time. I do what I know needs to be done but I struggle to do it. My anxiety and depression is so bad it’s a struggle just to get out of bed. I just want to cry cry cry and sleep sleep sleep and cry a bunch more. I’m 55 my life should not like this. I filed for disability almost 4 years ago. I have a lawyer but it just seems like nothing will ever go my way. I will never be truly happy. I tend to screw things up before they even have a chance to get going. I guess you could say I’m self distructive. I feel like I don’t deserve anything good or to ever be happy. I was married once for 8 years had two kids. 29 years ago on January 28, 1994 my husband killed his self. Still not sure how to feel about that. Did he kill his self because of me. I tried my best to be the very best wife I could be. I was left alone in this world at the age of 24 with two boys to raise alone. Not sure if I even done a good job or right by them. Neither of them talk to me and I just done understand that. Please us there anyone who can help this poor soul of my. I’m so very depressed.

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Re-Traumatized

I am a 65 year old woman who thought she had it all together but I don't after a powerful trigger. I have diagnosed bipolar 1, C-PTSD, DID and traits of BPD. Trying to understand what label is causing the most trouble is rarely easy. I was recently triggered or re-traumatized over a line in a story someone close to me was writing. It is supposed to be a science fiction novel, but I saw a line where a female child playing a doctor role for a couple having difficulty conceiving was really a 7 year old girl and she was saying she did not know what a specific sexual act was or how to perform it. I feel physically sick and can't get this line out of my heard because in reality, my father began sexually abusing me at 6 or 7 years old, and it began with the specific sexual act written into the story. Is the writer sick for even thinking these things let alone writing it down? I am having difficulty functioning right now but a will be seeing my psychologist in 5 days.

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Difference between Bipolar Disorder and Bipolar Spectrum Disorder

Hi, I was diagnosed with Bipolar Spectrum Disorder a couple of weeks ago. I don't have Bipolar 1 or 2 or Cyclothymia as my symptoms don't meet the diagnostic criteria. Rather my psychiatrist described bipolar as being on a spectrum and my mood swings fall on this spectrum, albeit not to the extent that would carry a Bipolar Disorder diagnosis. It is a bit confusing as some articles uses the terms Bipolar Disorder and Bipolar Spectrum Disorder interchangeably. Has anyone else been diagnosed with this? Thanks in advance #BipolarDisorder

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The Bipolar Paradox #BipolarDisorder #MentalHealth

At present there’s no cure for Bipolar Disorder, only remedies to control the severity of the highs and lows. So, is this the way it is or is there a cure out there that we are yet to find? They say nothing is eternal but at moment it seems Bipolar is. Are the cycles it presents itself in a depiction of itself? Is it a constant, revolving phenomenon that is cycling around again and again, never stopping or starting but continuing? With its repetitive originality that makes it different every time it rears its head, it renders you to be branded insane as you try to battle it or understand it.

What is your opinion on your own Bipolar? What is Bipolar to you?

#BipolarDepression #Bipolar1Disorder #Bipolar2Disorder

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