Brain Cancers

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    I'm new here!

    Hi, my name is Sad_Dad. I'm here because my demons are winning and I am not sure where to turn. I tried talking to my spouse about it which has helped in the past. It seems everyone is just done with me and my only reason for being here is to provide for my family. I barely make ends meet working 60 plus hours a week. My oldest daughter has brain cancer and just finished Chemo and will begin Radiation in August. She does not live with me but I have always been here for her. I dont foresee me being around much longer if I cant get all the bad out of my head. I think thats whats wrong. I honestly have zero idea why I am so down.

    #MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #OCD #Grief

    Post

    My uncle is dying

    I am only 20 years old and have never had a close family member pass away. Does anyone with more experience have any advice for how I can support my mom as she comes to terms with the impending loss of her brother? I am worried about her and even more worried about my grandma.

    I don't know, it's just going to be so strange to see him this Christmas and know it's going to be the last time. The literal last time. This big tall man with an impressive white beard, bright blue eyes that stare right into your soul, a scintillating wit, and a deep rolling singing voice, he's going to be gone, completely and forever.

    #Cancer #stroke #LungCancer #braincancer #Grief #Death #Family

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    #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #cancermom #SpecialNeedsParent

    Hello everyone, I’m new to this app and I’m going through the unthinkable right now.. I am 21(in a few days) and I have a 4 yr old little boy with lvl 3 autism and recently diagnosed with a rare brain cancer called ATRT. I also have a 4 month old daughter. I was diagnosed with Borderline personality disorder at 18 and still have a hard time managing it. I’m married (pending divorce) of my narcissistic and abusive baby daddy. I just really need support and possibly dbt skills or something… please

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    The grief for the loss of those who are still alive

    In January 2020 my father had a breakdown, and in the hospital emergency room where my mother had dragged him thinking he was having a stroke, we discovered cancer. First they talked about a brain tumor, which would be scary in itself, but given the history of two aunts who had had brain tumors, operated on and got well, it didn’t seem like the worst-case scenario. Unfortunately it wasn’t just that. We were facing an advanced cancer, complex, cruel and incurable.

    My family always told the story of the “cat that fell off the roof”. Basically, it narrated that it was not correct to give the news that a cat died, but to unravel the outcome little by little.

    The cat climbed onto the roof.

    OK.

    The cat fell off the roof.

    Hmm.

    The cat died.

    Oh.

    With us, it was similar. “There is a tumor”. Okay, I trust in medicine, it’s “just” to operate. My sister and I weren’t even in the country. She ran to our hometown, promising to tell me the truth about the gravity of the situation. It didn’t take long for me to get a desperate call where my sister narrated being stopped by doctors in the hospital corridor, where they began introducing the theme of “survival”.

    With surgery scheduled, I took the first flight I could get the next day, to get there before then. I didn’t know what to expect, but I felt it could be a farewell. I, who always had an extremely troubled relationship with my father — about whom we sometimes wonder if some complicated traits didn’t come from the disease, which could have been in my father’s head for 10 years, slowly growing, according to the doctors — had a moment very striking where I asked “You thought I wouldn’t come, right?” where he, from the hospital bed, replied “Yeah. I thought I wouldn’t come.”

    While my mother and sister acted in a state of despair, I was still in shock. I would sit down with the doctor and start asking very didactic questions to try to understand what was going on in that head now even more tragically intriguing. And he asked questions that no one else had the courage to ask. What will happen from now on? What can we expect from here? How long is he estimated to have? How will my father die? How should we prepare for this moment?

    Doctors aren’t gods and don’t have all the answers. My father’s were extremely competent, solicitous, available and patient. But still they don’t have all the answers. Even more so when it comes to the mind, there is a lot of uncharted territory. “There are patients who, with surgery and treatment, survive for another 6 months; there are rare cases of people who live up to 10 years.”

    But a phrase that the neurosurgeon always tried to make clear, in a subtle but necessary way, was “he will never be the same again”. Which opens up many interpretations of how much a person can stop being himself.

    Read the rest here on medium: bit.ly/3CzU8UQ

    #Grief #Cancer #Loss #BrainCancers #Parentloss #Depression #antiexy

    Question

    How do I get past having a dismissive & completely unsupportive family concerning my sexual abuse?

    I found out a few days ago that my nephew has been allowing the family member who attempted to sexually assualt me when young around our newest member of the family. Luckily the mother to his baby saw sense & believed me when she told me in passing & realised my reaction so I told her the truth & she instantly wanted nothing to do with him & felt disgusted he'd had him around her baby. When she confronted him, he told her "there was no proof, so am I supposed to just not hang out with him just because she said it happened." My nephew is 8 months younger than me, my attempted abuser was 26 years older than me & I was 17 at the time. I was sexually abused at 13 & again at 14, 6 months later. My nephew knew this as I broke down & was introduced to church due to not coping well with my experiences. After I started going to church & began to try to heal I was violated again but this time I didn't freeze. But my nephew doesn't believe that happened after I moved out of the city away from my family & haven't spoken to abuser since. I have chronic health conditions & c-PTSD 10 years later, I'm heavily disabled & lost my mum 2 years ago. My mother knew about all the abuse but didn't believe me enough to help me through it. She invited him to her home & continued to do so after. I wasn't able to be with her while she fought stage 4 brain cancer as I was disabled myself. My mum had the entire family helping her through it & they kept me updated the entire time, I was there when I experienced levels of illness that allowed me to. My abuser held on to my mum while she passed, she had her entire family around her accept her youngest daughter who couldn't stay the night there because I was bedbound needing carers myself at that time, as if I pushed it at all I collasped & travelling down there was pushing it every time. I was heartbroken finding that my abuser was the one touching my mum as 5 days before I was told I was disabled due to being abused repeatedly. He was the straw that broke the camel's back, according to my neurologist who had diagnosed me with FND just 5 days before. I messaged him that night, I was way too nice, but I told him to not sit anywhere near me at the funeral & he sat right next to me in the next seat, as I was on the end with my wheelchair, nodding his head & laughing with everyone else. I didn't even grieve my mum in peace. Now I find out he's had so much contact with the next generation & my nephew allowed it knowing me. I thought he knee me better than anyone else in my family. Now I realise absolutely no cares about me in the way I do them. It hurts beyond feelings. It hurts Being & knowing where my being comes from hurts because it isn't loved by my roots. How do I move past that?

    Post

    Unconditional love #POTS#PTSD

    In 11 days it will be 18yrs since I lost my dearest friend Val to cancer. She and I had gone through similar health issues and had both lost loved ones to cancer 2yrs previously. We were still grieving and our friendship helped us heal and then her cancer returned 3months after we met. The next 5 years we became even closer - and when she died I was holding her hand and singing her favorite hymn when she raised her eyebrow in farewell. I felt a rush of happiness for her that her suffering was over, followed by overwhelming loss. In the time that followed I was so grateful for every moment of our friendship. She loved life and laughed often and always lived her best life. She knew not to hold back emotionally in her friendships and giving everyone unconditional love - perhaps having cancer over 20 years taught her that - or being a much loved only child. She used to say God bless at the end of every phone call and once in the hospice after 2 weeks of silence - she had stopped speaking because of brain cancer - as I hugged her and turned to go, I heard those words again. It was one of the last gifts she gave me. I feel blessed indeed to have had her in my life and find comfort in wearing the amethyst ring that had been her mothers that she gave me when she was still well. I would go to her place and cook a meal and then she would do dessert - tinned fruit and vanilla icecream topped with contreau, then we would recline on her couches drinking herbal teas in compatible silence listening to Willie Nelson or John Denver. Bliss!