Headache

I wrote this in August 2021, but I just found it as I was going through files on my phone. Thought I would share it in case it’s helpful for anyone.

TW: suicidal ideation, hospitals, mental illness, American health care system, probably more. Don’t read if you’re low on spoons.

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Note: This was my 3rd time in In-patient. It was by far the weirdest and most unpleasant of the three. I’m not sure how to process what happened. I originally wrote this just as a note on my phone so I’d have a record.
______

I was at the ER for about 20 hours (I got there at about 11:30 pm Wednesday). It was rough. I couldn’t get comfortable. Too hot, too cold, sweating, shaking. I did my crying for a few hours. Mid-morning (maybe 3 am or so) I was feeling better - not good but not in danger. At this point, I was wishing I would have looked into an IOP program rather than going to the hospital…

I ended up sitting in this room they called “the pod.” I met a homeless guy who came in to get his meds refilled (fuck the American healthcare system- you shouldn’t have to go to the ER for your basic meds…). He had been in jail for over a decade, covered head to toe in ink. So soft spoken, so kind. Even with his issues, he was comforting everyone else.

At 5-5:30 pm on Thursday I got transferred to a psych hospital. I was reminded of how uncomfortable ambulances are.

Once there I went through some violating shit (that’s still fucking with me). They went through all my stuff (without asking), then they did a cavity search. Hadn’t planned on being butt-ass naked in front of two nurses and two hospital cops… and then they put on an ankle bracelet. Fun.

I only got to eat twice the whole time and never got my meds. So I was having withdrawal symptoms from being off my psych meds for that long. More cold sweats and vivid, violent nightmares. Also, I had a headache that turned into a migraine. Take your meds - withdrawal sucks.

I was supposed to stay 72 hours minimum, but I talked my way into leaving early. It was causing more trauma than it was helping. I feel like I should get some punk rock points for talking my way out of the psych ward on Friday the 13th (my attempt at humor currently).

(The next day)

I got a notification that my chart was updated so I just read through it. Maybe I’m misreading something but apparently, I have a history of Anorexia and PTSD. I mean that’s news to me, but why not… Also, my blood work looks like maybe I’m anemic again. Cool, cool.

So yeah that was my last few days. Needless to say, I want to live in the woods and just not be a part of this society anymore.

Lastly, for whatever it’s worth, these were the two songs that were stuck in my head during this whole time

open.spotify.com/track/3lnGFIDQE2QOmEe18tUA1f

open.spotify.com/track/2RB1HRucdHDS8qqlmQRKmb

Need a little hot migraine mess in your life? Join podcast cohosts (and “professional” neurology patients) Kat and Skye as they kick off Migraine and Headache Awareness Month with their signature brain pain banter and tips. They’ll introduce The Mighty’s new Health & (un)Wellness podcast and share what’s to come during their season, Mighty With Migraine. Learn more about their migraine stories and bring your questions — sunglasses, ice hats, and sarcasm welcome!

RSVP for the event here: events.themighty.com/events/details/the-mighty-chronic-illne...

P.S. To be the first to listen to the new episode (especially if you live with brain fog and love a good reminder like we do!), head here to listen to the trailer and hit subscribe on Spotify or Apple Podcasts: bit.ly/MightyMigrainePodcast

#Migraine #facebooklive #virtualevents #MightyEvents #chronicmigraine #ChronicPain #Pain

We all struggle at some point whether it be with mental illness or physical health problems. This is just a sad fact of life but the good news is that we are stronger than what is in front of us. Sure our health problems may never go away but don't let that discourage you from reaching your goals and dreams. You are just as special as anyone else and just as capable even if you have limitations. There is something that makes each of us unique.

If you're struggling with negative or anxious thoughts like I am then take a breath and acknowledge it. The more you acknowledge it the less power it seems to have over you. Sometimes our thoughts are misleading …. They can only be guided by emotion. This is okay so long as we are willing to work with it. Struggling does not make you less than, it makes you human!

We are all on this journey of life together and our struggles possess the ability to teach us things. Some lessons are hard to face while others come quite easily.

The point is, you are stronger and more capable than you give yourself credit for. I sometimes downplay my accomplishments but I shouldn't. Neither should you. If you got out of bed today-good. If you ate-good. If you went to work-good. Every little accomplishment deserves attention no matter how small. By celebrating our victories we validate ourselves and we deserve that. Our feelings and situations are valid even if others don't think so.

What I am saying is: YOU GOT THIS! Whatever life throws at you is not impossible to deal with. So go out there and shine like the brilliant person you are because that's what the world needs, more people like you. I believe in you…and yes I believe in myself…most of the time, but reading this post really invigorated and empowered me.

As always please stay safe and reach out for help if you need to.

~Amcron
@stillsearching1994

#MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Selfcare #Selflove #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar2Disorder #Bipolar1Disorder #BipolarDepression #ADHD #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #COVID19 #Migraine #Headache #RareDisease #HIVAIDS #PeripheralNeuropathy #BackPain #PTSD #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #IfYouFeelHopeless #Hope #CheckInWithMe #TheMighty #MightyTogether #MightyMinute #DistractMe #MightyQuestions

If you could have a friend or loved support you best when you are depressed or in pain what would you like them to say? What would you like them to stop asking? Sometimes just listening, giving a hug or just being there can be so very helpful, but when you are struggling what can people say that would make you feel the most supported? How can they let you know they’ve got your back? What words would be the most comforting? What words have been the most hurtful? If you could have someone say (or not say) anything to make you feel better what would help you the most?

#MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Selfcare #Selflove #BipolarDisorder #Bipolar2Disorder #Bipolar1Disorder #BipolarDepression #ADHD #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #COVID19 #Migraine #Headache #HIVAIDS #PeripheralNeuropathy #BackPain #PTSD #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #IfYouFeelHopeless #Hope #CheckInWithMe #TheMighty #MightyTogether #MightyMinute #DistractMe #MightyQuestions

Sure, doctors can give some stellar advice — but you know who ACTUALLY passes along the best tips? The people who actually live with the condition! So consider this post the ultimate playground of swapping hacks, tools, and tips that make managing your migraine symptoms a bit easier. Scroll through to pick up a new one to try out!

Here are my top 3:

🥶 Buy an ice cap (like the Headache Hat) ASAP

🥤 Invest in electrolyte powders like Liquid IV (so many other options on the market too — I’m just picky about the taste of them)

🎾 Position two tennis balls at the base of your skull (and lay on them!) when the pain is especially intense for about 15 minutes — it mimics a craniosacral massage

What are yours?

#Migraine #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #RareDisease #Disability #Fibromyalgia #Endometriosis #POTS #EhlersDanlosSyndrome

In my recent poll about whether or not we all feel comfortable explaining migraine to others, I was really struck by one community member’s comment about how we never stop learning (especially because the science is always changing!). I couldn’t agree more.

I’m curious — where do you go to learn more about the disease? Are there certain advocates or medical journals you keep up with? Do you read the studies and fact sheets published by nonprofits like the American Migraine Foundation, National Headache Foundation, or International Headache Society? Or do you lean on first-person narratives like we publish on The Mighty or migraine.com?

Drop those resources below. ⤵️

#Migraine #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Disability #RareDisease #ClusterHeadache #Fibromyalgia #Lupus #Endometriosis #EhlersDanlosSyndrome