Headache

Hi,

I have been hospitalized since June 16 and I'll be transferred in a psychiatric clinic in July.

It wasn't my choice. It was forced. No consent.

And it's confirmed, no surprise at all, I'm autistic.

It is really difficult for me. The AC is loud, the nurses in the corridors, plumbers are loud, people talking etc...

I either don't eat and and up on perfusion or eat but secretly purge after..

I cant express myself.

Im overwhelmed, overstimulated. I am exhausted.

I have migraines because of that. No meds heals this pain. I had migraines since childhood.

I used to be epileptic when I was younger and put on really strong medicine that has been banned in my country few years after.

I think it's probably a sequel to this but nothing on the MRI.

They gave me accupan for the pain but well still bit painful.

#Migraine #Depression #Anxiety #EatingDisorder #Autism #MentalHealth #Headache

I saw my headache specialist. She asked if I'm still having memory gaps. I said yeah and we both kinda sighed relief and frustration. Now we just gotta figure out if it's the new BP meds. I started taking it right before it started.
I'm scheduled for an MRI and a CT scan of my brain. I wonder if I have one.
#Migraine #Headache

I have an appointment with my headache specialist on Thursday. I don't know what she can do. My head is pounding. We've tried all of the meds and now the only option is Botox injections in my forehead. I know it's a simple procedure. But I am not sure if my migraine is being caused by the exotropia. So I need to see the surgeon again. I've got an appointment with her next month. I am absolutely exhausted.

Just finished eating lunch. I heated up some popcorn chicken and tater tots. When I turned to walk back to my bed my right side of my hip/lumbar spiked to 9. I hobbled back to my bed and started to eat and then I remembered I need to ask Pauley for a Norco. *Asked for Norco, got one plus CBD cream on my back*
I've got an appointment with my headache specialist this month and then next month I get to see my new Endo for the first time.
I'm on the fence about going to the Juneteenth celebration on Saturday.
🌮 But I'm quite sure I am going to the taco festival on the 20th. It just sounds like a really wild fun time. Tacos, luchador wrestling, cutest Chihuahua contest, mariachi bands... And more.
Sigh... I just got mentholated CBD cream up my nose.
I meditated for an hour this morning. It was very relaxing.

This month is proving quite interesting.
Pauley and I went out 2 weekends ago to the Ren faire. We had a great time. Saw some amazing costumes, watched the bellydancers while we ate lunch (lunch was splitting a giant turkey leg and oh gosh it was delicious), I treated myself to a yummy adult drink (I've been on a lavender lemonade kick for a while... They had boozy lavender lemonade!!!), and right before we went home we split an ice cream sundae with blueberries and strawberries and whipped cream. It was lovely.
This Saturday we're going to go to a local Juneteenth celebration. I'm really hoping for some soul food cuz I've been craving it for months.
This Sunday I was hoping to go treat ourselves to some ice cream at a local shop that has great reviews.
On the 19th I have an appointment with my headache specialist. We're readdressing how I'm handling the new meds and getting me ready for the Botox injections.
The 20th is the taco festival by us. There's gonna be mariachi bands, luchador wrestling, Chihuahua contest, and more than a few taco trucks. It's gonna be awesome!
The 21st is when the farmers cheese making class happens. I don't think it's doable. In fact I'm almost certain I can't swing it. But it would be nice. We're low on funds. So maybe we can use our Googlefu and find instructions on how to make it from home.
Now that I have my walker I feel more confident about being away from home. It really helped me at the Ren faire.
***********************
I'm sorry I haven't been around much. It's ridonkulously crazy anxiety and pain. I'm trying to find a hip specialist for meds. I'm furious at my previous doctor just up and ditching me and not doing procedures he's been responsible for when he knows he's the only person out of his office who can do it. He knows I've been having trouble finding a hip specialist who will do anything to help. But he doesn't care.
I thought I had an appointment with my eye surgeon this month but I can't find the info.
So much to keep straight. I'm exhausted.
Edit: my appointment with my eye surgeon is July 23rd. I also have an appointment with my new Endo on July 8th.

#Cancer #athanasiadou #linda Athanasiadou

Linda Athanasiadou — cancer survivor writing at the intersection of health and humanity

When my oncologist finally said the words “no evidence of disease,” I smiled, nodded, and thanked him. Then I went home, sat on the edge of my bed, and cried—not from joy, but from something closer to confusion. Relief, yes. But also fear. Because no one prepares you for how hard it is to live after treatment, when the outside world thinks you’re fine—but inside, the fear lingers like a shadow.

For months, maybe years, your life revolves around fighting. Schedules are built around chemo cycles, scan dates, blood draws. There’s a structure to survival. And then suddenly, it stops. You ring the bell. You go home. And you’re left alone with your body—changed, fatigued, and no longer monitored with the same urgency. That silence can be terrifying.

Every ache becomes a question. Every headache, a whisper of dread. I found myself scanning for signs of recurrence constantly—body-checking, Googling symptoms at midnight, second-guessing every sensation. And worse, I didn’t feel I could talk about it. People wanted celebrations. They wanted me to “move on.” But emotionally, I was still in the thick of it.

Research backs this up. Studies published in 2024 and early 2025 confirm that post-treatment anxiety is incredibly common among survivors. According to the National Cancer Institute, fear of recurrence is one of the most persistent and distressing issues for cancer survivors—even years after treatment ends. And yet, it’s rarely addressed with the same seriousness as physical care.

What helped me most was naming it. Saying out loud: “I’m afraid.” Talking to a therapist who understood survivorship. Joining peer groups where I didn’t have to pretend. Creating routines that grounded me when uncertainty loomed—daily walks, journaling, mindfulness. I also gave myself permission to not feel grateful every second of the day. Gratitude and fear can coexist.

I still live with that shadow. Maybe I always will. But it doesn’t define me anymore. It walks beside me instead of ahead of me. And on most days, I can look it in the eye and say: Not today.

If this resonates with your journey, I invite you to read my article, “The Silent Anxiety After Remission: When the World Thinks You’re Fine,” The Silent Anxiety After Remission: When the World Thinks You’re Fine where I explore the emotional aftermath of surviving—and how to keep moving forward even when fear whispers in the background.

You’re not broken for being afraid. You’re human. And in that honesty, healing begins.

I have been having the most painful tension headaches ever. I’m on quite a few medications namely for bipolar. I went to the doctor the other day and got a shot for this headache. I have been stressed so that could be a major cause but I’m also a dishwasher so am lifting a lot at work. I try to avoid caffeine but I do slip up now and then. I keep asking myself what is going on and what did I do to bring this pain on every day (for the last week now.) I don’t normally post on here but just felt like sharing.