Nooneislistening

I am diagnosed Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis, generalized anxiety, panic disorder, OCD, and reoccurring situational and clinical depression.
Lately I have been feeling terrible but pulling my self together enough to get things done, but more and more it gets harder. Today I learned my recent ultrasound of my thyroid came back with a highly suspicious large nodule.
I’m a mom of 3 girls, two young and one in middle school.
I am a stay at home mom.
My husband is away for work most of the time. (5-6 days/nights a week)
Over the last couple months my depression and anxiety have gotten bad.
I’ve noticed I’ve been feeling less and less okay. And today I hear the one thing anyone with anxiety wants to hear...
I think you have thyroid cancer. Okay let’s manage it. Let’s clear it up!
But oh we thought you had auto immune disorders and anxiety but we were wrong.
My worst nightmare, literally coming true.
I share the news with my husband who, two years ago lost his father to cancer, and he literally laughs at me.
I’m at a loss. I am the rock and the brick of my family. I do everything for my daughters, I’d do anything for my parents and siblings. I am the ROCK to my family. But I have no one I can lean on for support and it’s literally killing me. #Nooneislistening

#Anxiety
how can I get better at my job when I have days where I can’t get out of bed. so I call in sick. when really from the outside I look fine but inside I am a wreck. my husband has trouble understanding and my panic attacks are so bad that he doesn’t know how to help. I try to find good articles for him to read but it’s the same thing every time.
“honey you are fine”
you have no idea
if only words could explain how I feel
#SuicidalThoughts #Nooneislistening #scared #Anxiety