Do you ever feel like every time you make any progress with your illness/disease you win a little then it knock you so much father back that you will never get back to were you were before?

So I have FND which means my nerves and brain function abdominally and communicate about as well as toddlers playing the telephone game. Add in a sprinkle of Tourettes Syndrome and Sensory Processeing Disorder, Migraine, Dyskinesia, Dystonia, and we are currently exploring epilepsy. All this results in me being confined to a wheelchair at least 85% of the time and need to be supervised if I am not. Along with eating difficulties, communication problems ect...

I have to go in for occupational therapy and physical therapy once a year to help me maintain quality of life. Sometimes we add speech or cognitive to spice things up if I need it . All these therapies are great and can act as kinda a filter on how to adapt my life to limitations and give some good ideas on how to make life easier within my limitations my body has placed on me. However it always feels like we make a little progress with them and once I "graduate" out of them (stop making progress usually after a the first 2 months) my body starts to decline again even though I countue to do my home programs (hey I want as much quality of life as I can get I mean I turn 20 in the fall I will take what I can get). This happens with me staring to fall more, my hands start to get weaker, I drop more weight, ect.

2 steps forward 6 steps back.

Every time. It seems like I am on this never ending loop of yes some progress. Whap out of no where I get worse ...

2 steps forward 6 steps back.

It's like this dance me and my body play. Oh you gonna work to try and get better. Sike now your worse enjoy the new wheels.

2 steps forward 6 steps back.

Around and around we continue this dance and we can't seem to figure out why this downward spiral keeps happening. Like I'm not gonna keep fighting for my quality of life but man would I like to stop this dance or at least hit pause for a bit.

2 steps forward 6 steps back

It's exhausting. I just moved and my new pcp asked if I had made any progress on getting better and it hit me that no actually I keep getting worse and my symptoms keep getting more debilitating as time goes on. So now we redo all the testing and redo all the things to see if anything has changed...

2 steps forward 6 steps back.

Anyway I'm just excused with everything. I'm still gonna try and still gonna give it everything I got which honestly isn't much at this point. Still gonna give it a go. Got to continue this dance in homes that some day it will be 6 steps forward and 2 steps back instead.

#FunctionalNeurologicalDisorder #ChronicFatigue #ocupationaltherapy #PhysicalTherapy #notmakingprogess