Overwhelmedmom

I’ve hit my limit. Between my illnesses my oldest (11yo) has to have another heart surgery at the end of March and my heart is breaking. I know in my head that it’s not my fault but that doesn’t stop my emotions from feeling like it’s all my fault. Overwhelmed is the closest word I can think of to describe how I feel. Like a panic attack is just sitting below the surface, just waiting for something else to happen, or for the world to break.
#Overwhelmedmom
#CongenitalHeartDefectDisease

I kinda hate my job. it is perfect for a single mom bankers hours but I cant deal with my co-worker...grown adults talking about people behind other people's back. my paranoia is to its highest point...my anxiety makes it worse. I always feel sick to my stomach when I go in. but again it's perfect for a single mom...single income...no support and no able ears that won't judge. not happy cant be vocal in fear of judgement. need a happy place. Any one else feel this way.

I’m new to this so I’m not sure what I’m doing yet. If I am doing this wrong, please forgive me. I’ve had an extremely stressful week with doctor’s checkups for my leukemia that I’ve been successfully fighting for 13.5 years...YAY...psychiatrist appointment for my depression & anxiety meds that I’ve been taking for 27 years and trying to hold myself together because I’m tired of it. I’m tired of it all. I’m tired of having cancer. I’m tired of taking antidepressants so I can even fake a smile. I’m tired of taking care of four entitled teenage daughters who have been given everything their entire lives (and yes, I accept responsibility). I don’t want to have to deal with prom this weekend or take care of my husband who had knee surgery today. I want to ball up in bed and cry until it hurts. I’m tired of being told by family, friends, and strangers alike, “You don’t look sick.” And today, the straw that broke this camel’s back was when my mother, who has always been one of my biggest supporters, says to me those three little words that send me into orbit....”Pull yourself together.”
I’m NOT TOGETHER. I HAVEN’T BEEN TOGETHER FOR A VERY LONG TIME! Heaven forbid the neighbors notice that one of the family members isn’t “together”!
I’m done. I’m over it. I don’t want to deal with any of it anymore! I want to quit. Advice please??
#cml #Meltdowns #Overwhelmedmom #thingsnottosay #cancersucks #fightlikeagirl

#CheckInWithMe

Been struggling with my own anxiety and depression lately but have to keep putting it aside and put on the strong face because both of my children struggle with it as well and need my support. Finally had to separate from my boyfriend simply because I couldn’t manage his untreated bipolar depression on top of everything else. I’m tired but I don’t sleep and am a divorced mom with very little father support. In fact, he often is the cause of the anxiety in all of us! What are we doing to ourselves?!
#CheckInWithMe