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Friendship Zoom Notes
Set Boundaries to Protect Your Energy
1 Limit Distractions----choose certain hours where you focus on important work----no chatting, scrolling, or multi tasking. Let others know you're "unavailable" during this time so you can fully concentrate.
2 Say No---you don't have to accept every request. If something drains you, doesn't match your goals, or you simply don't have the capacity, it's ok to say "no" without guilt.
3 Define Hours-----decide when you start & finish (or when you're available to others), & stick to it-----avoid checking emails, messages, or tasks outside those times so your mind can rest.
4 Pick Your People-----Spend more time with people who support, encourage, & respect you. Gradually distance yourself from those who constantly drain your energy, criticize, or bring negativity.
5 Know Your Worth-----Recognize the value of your time, skills, & effort. Don't feel pressured to do free work, constant favors, or go beyond your limits just to please others.
6 Self-Advocate-----Speak up when something feels unfair, overwhelming, or disrespectful. It's ok to ask for clarification, better conditions, more support, or proper recognition.
7 Define Balance-----Create a clear line between work & personal life. When work time is over, switch mentally to--no work, calls, no thinking about tasks, just personal time.
8 Take "You" Time----Schedule time just for you---reading, walking, hobbies, or simply resting. Treat it like an appointment that you don't cancel.
9 Separate Identity----Remember: you are more than your job, your productivity, or your achievements. Your worth doesn't disappear when you're resting or not "doing" anything.
10 Prioritize Rest----Plan breaks, days off, & sleep as seriously as you plan work. Rest isn't a reward----it's a necessity so you can stay healthy, creative, & effective.
11 Push Back-----When someone asks for too much or sets unrealistic deadlines, calmly explain what's actually possible...offer alternatives instead of silently burning out.
12 Limit Negativity-----Reduce time spent on gossip, drama, complaining, or toxic environments----online & offline. Protect your mind by choosing healthier conversations & spaces.
Types of Boundaries
Rigid---avoids getting close to others, doesn't ask for help or reciprocation, finds it hard to share thoughts, feelings & ideas, leaves before things get too serious, ghosts or leaves with no warning when boundaries are breached.
Healthy----share & receive, has no values & opinions, communicates in a healthy way, puts their needs over others wants, doesn't give to the point of burn out, says no & accepts no from others.
Soft-----over shares feelings, hard to know where you end & others begin, can't say no or always gives in, gives even it hurts, needs praise or approval from others, overinvolved with other people's problems.
Set Boundaries
1 Identify Your Limits----Reflect on situations, relationships, or tasks that make you feel overwhelmed or drained.
2 Communicate Clearly----Be honest & assertive when expressing your needs. For example, say "I can't take on extra work right now because I need to focus on my projects."
3 Learn to Say No----Practice saying no without guilt. Understand that prioritizing your well-being is not selfish but necessary.
4 Set Work-Lift Boundaries----Avoid overworking by setting clear time for work & personal time. For instance, no work email after 7pm.
5 Limit Toxic Relationships---Distance yourself from people who consistently drain your energy or disrespect your boundaries.
6 Create Personal Time----Dedicate specific times in your schedule for self-care & activities you enjoy.
7 Stick to Your Decisions----Be firm once you set a boundary. Consistency is key to ensuring others respect your limits.
8 Monitor Your Emotional Responses-----Pay attention to how situations make you feel & adjust boundaries if necessary.
9 Seek Support----If boundary setting feels challenging, talk to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist for guidance.
10 Practice Self-Compassion----Remember that it's ok to put yourself first. Protecting your energy is an act of self-respect.
How To Set Boundaries
1 Say No Without Over-explaining---"I'm not available for that"
2 Protect Your Time----"I can stay for 30 minutes then I have to go"
3 Claim Your Space---"Please don't come into my room without knocking"
4 Detach from Guilt----"I'm choosing rest over plans today. That's ok."
5 Redirect the Conversation---"I'm not comfortable discussing that. Let's talk about something else."
6 Hold Your Line----"I've made my decision. I'm sticking with it."
7 Block the Emotional Dumping----"I'm not in the right headspace to take that on right now."
