Aloneforthebetter

After years of feeling lonely, sad, depressed, and much more, with very little will to live.

I started doing arts and crafts to passed time, reading, watching TV, incredibly enough I realized that while I was suffering from loneliness, I began to enjoy 😉 my time alone.

I started slowly and joined a club, went out to dinner by myself, and it didn’t feel painful. I was enjoying my time.

For me the most important “event” was when I realized there is no drama around me. No Bickering, nobody saying “you said, this one said”. It feels like a weight was lifted of my back in ways I had never known. No pressure to please anyone, saving my money for myself I read of helping others who are ungrateful.

It has been a true awakening of my spirit and soul. 💞🙏🏻💞😘

#Loneliness #AloneWithMyThoughts #Aloneforthebetter #alone

No one knows me but I will get to know you
No one sees me cause I’m to busy seeing things through
No one hears me but can beg me to listen.

A life alone with these standers isn’t much of a life.
Take it from some one trying to live it...
Some how being able to better every one around me except myself. ?
I thought I was used to this kind of life. It’s just that as I got older and older, then had some kids of my own. Things became to clear for me to brush off any more.

Truth is my entire life FROM BIRTH has been filled with sexual/physical/emotional/ financial abuse.

I don’t have any family. Never really have. Been ditched a lot by the person who only wanted a pay check when she had me.

By the time I had my babies and felt I had any kind of choice for myself or my loves.
My mind was to far gone. I F*cking lost it!
With that I lost every thing that ment some thing to me.

I recovered, I did every thing I needed to.
My kids all ways want to be around even past all that has happened. They are troopers!

The ex-husband isn’t such a fantastic guy towards me. Good dad tho. I feel I could be that good or even better. If ever given the kind of support I’d need.

I’ve tried to date. It’s same thing every time....... just guys trying to f*ck me... nothing real.
Every one seems willing to take take take but never give back or even just give a little...

So here I am .... alone for the better.

#Aloneforthebetter #Depression #BPD #AbuseSurvivors #cronicpain