Avoidant Personality Disorder

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Avoidant Personality Disorder
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    I'm new here!

    Hi, my name is WhimsicalTrix. I'm here because I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and depression and generalized anxiety disorder when I was in my early teens. I am now 40 and had my diagnosis change to borderline personality disorder with avoidant personality disorder and social anxiety. I can't explain what finding this diagnosis has done for me. Bipolar never really fit as my mood swings are more multiple times per day as opposed to week long episodes. Having behaviors that for years and years have been brushed off as overly emotional, clingy, whiney, needy, bitchy, rude, selfish, lazy, manipulative, sociopathic, I mean really you name it, but to have them validated is beyond life changing for myself. Even though you know, deep down you aren't these things, hearing them over and over and over and at the same time presenting behaviors that on the outside coincide, you start to believe them. I'm just looking really for a way to heal and for ways to bring my friends and family around to being open minded and receptive to this new diagnosis. I'm at the point where I need there understanding and support. I've been living with this, thinking these things, really not liking myself and wondering why, when I try so hard and go out of my way to make everyone happy and like me, why no one wants or likes me.. But I'm working on that every day.

    #MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #AvoidantPersonalityDisorder #SocialAnxiety

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    I’m new here!

    Hi, my name is redx. I'm here because I have been diagnosed with the below and it's been extremely hard and I really need help and would love to learn as much as i can to help others and myself.

    #MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #OCD #EatingDisorder #AvoidantPersonalityDisorder #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #ParanoidPersonalityDisorder #SocialAnxiety #AutismSpectrumDisorder

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    #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #AvoidantPersonalityDisorder #Depression

    I always felt different .
    I always knew something was off with me .
    I struggle so much to just exist .
    I feel so empty it hurts .

    I thought I had it all figured .
    But the slightest stress put me on my knees .
    I’m down . And I don’t know how to get up .

    I’m tired of pretending .
    I feel like I’m just a list of what’s wrong .

    My body attacks myself .

    I’m tired of working on myself .
    I’m tired of being an empty shell .

    I really hoped for better future . But I’m starting to doubt myself . What use to work to calm my void doesn’t work anymore .

    Nothing works anymore .

    Am I just my trauma ?

    27 reactions 11 comments

    I'm new here!

    Hi, my name is Pollydoodle_71. I'm here because I am sinking .

    #MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Migraine #Fibromyalgia
    # Acoustic Neuroma.
    The thing is , upon many a time in contemplation, reflection and exasperation , I honestly believe that I have Avoidant Personality Disorder .
    I am already formally diagnosed with BPD … my Co-morbidity being MDD , but yet , I seem to be utterly incapable of even broaching the topic , with ANYONE , regarding this persistent feeling that there is more … That I somehow can recognise that I have Avoidant Personality Disorder also . Is it not within a seperate ‘cluster’ ?? How could it even be possible to span over two cluster types within the one person ??!
    Then I question the very validity or importance of having yet one more diagnosis, written down in my file …just what is the point ?….. What is the point of ANYTHING anymore…???!
    However , there is some ‘core’ that incessantly needs to comprehend EVERYTHING. ‘ Why ? What then ? But , WHY ??! ‘
    I am also what I like to refer as a ‘ random perfectionist’ ( eg : chaos and mess, but if stuffed behind a closed closet , then the PERCEPTION of order and tidiness is achieved )….. well , there is simply something eating away at me that , not a single soul in this universe KNOWS me ! Then again , do I even recognise who or what is typing this ??? PLUS - who or why should anybody give a damn ??!
    I do apologise sincerely for rambling and taking up your valuable time .
    I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a very healthy and happy New Year! Kind regards x


    13 reactions 11 comments

    not sure if I'm back (I'm mostly scared), or just a quick drop-in 😳

    So hi, again.

    I got the job (it was toxic/busy/anxiety-provoking as hell, which was why I never had the time or energy to be on here) - ended up leaving it end Sept (looong story but if you're on my DMs I might share more if you wanna know - suffice to say I think its a combi of toxic boss + environment misfit + my MH was just not having it) ... and then I realised I was going nowhere and decided to pick up a copywriting course (another source of my panic but in a different way)

    To be honest, I didn't intend to start right after I left, but they said the early Oct intake was the last for the year. I'd planned on a mid-Oct/early-Nov ideally, but I didn't have much choice.

    So its now Nov, and having spent like 1k USD for the copywriting class (I was supposed to claim it on some govt credit thing but they stopped the scheme since - proceeded regardless cus I need skillsz) with no income, 💸

    Tempted as I am, I haven't ditched off therapy ... yet ($115 USD 😳🙈) & am so crazy thankful for P - but then like, 💸 .. my mom was okay for paying for the one I had on Thurs though (thanks ma)

    I still haven't taken money per se from my parents, although I'm spending on their money for meals/groceries this week since they left money for it and are abroad at the moment (getting very close if I can't get a hols job tho) - the plan was to get a freelance/PT job for the festive season but I apparently can't even snag a PT F&B hourly job - I suspect I'm over-qualified compared to a undergrad student .. so wtf? (That's why I've stayed off here, my self esteem is beneath the pits)

    I had a psychiatrist appt in October, just after the whole deal - my psychiatrist is pretty chill abt things, but for context the bulk of her other patients are like, treatment-resistant schizophrenia type cases. So a socially anxious young adult with capacity to hold a job, naturally, wouldn't be something she defines as "un-okay" or "problematic" in the greater hierachy of the mental health system 🙃🤔 She's not fussed lol and quite pleased abt me doing copywriting class 🤔

    But I'm struggling to cope - with going back on Sertraline (yes I just dropped off cos self-care went out the window in that job) and its adjustments, with the inability to get a PT hols job, with all my questions about worth and deservingness in the face of dwindling finances and the lack of a job.

    My MH is shit, not having a job is making my social anxiety worse, and low-key depression is real because I just feel so useless and undeserving of things. & a waste of resources and space.

    #CheckInWithMe #MentalHealth #Employment #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #AvoidantPersonalityDisorder #Depression [?]


    I’m new here!

    Hi, my name is morganingram. I'm here because something has got to change in my life. I’m out of options.

    #MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #ADHD #AvoidantPersonalityDisorder