🎄“The most wonderful time of year”?🎄
Have wanted to share this for days now but I’ve struggled to find the words. 🤔📝Christmas… it’s supposed to be the “most wonderful time of the year”, the “season to be jolly”, and the “hap-happiest season of all”, but it doesn’t always feel that way.
As a kid, for me, Christmas was always a big deal in my family, it was a busy, happy, excitable, almost magical, time of year. Even as a young adult in my twenties, Christmas was still an amazing time of year. In recent years though, the magic, excitement, and wonder, of the Christmas season seems to have faded and been replaced with sorrow, grief, and heartache. 😔 My mum always made sure that Christmas and New Year were fun, enjoyable, occasions that people looked forward to with excitement every year. Sadly, 6 years ago, not long after my 31st birthday, my mum passed away, and since then Christmas hasn’t been the same… nothing has been the same… 💔 My heart aches for her every day, and then Christmas time comes round and it makes my heart ache even more. I try to get into the excitement of Christmas and New Year because she told me that she wanted me to “get on with [my] life and enjoy [yourself] again”. And I try, I really try, especially at Christmas and New Year, but I still feel that overwhelming loss, which makes it difficult to enjoy this time of year the way that she would want me to. This, in turn, makes me feel like a failure, like I am letting her down, like I am failing to fulfil her dying wish. 😔 Then I feel bad that I am not as excited and eggar about celebrating Christmas and New Year than everyone else seems to be. I worry about sharing how low I am really feeling, and how difficult I find the holidays, because I don’t want to ruin anyone else’s mood.
I know that lots of people find the holidays difficult, for so many reasons, and that I’m not the only one feeling the way I do at this time of year, I just don’t really know who to turn to for support and advice. That’s when I remembered that there is one community that would understand, a place where people can relate to you, where people are offered support, encouragement, and compassion, instead of judgment and criticism - the amazing community of my fellow Mighties. #Grief #CheckInWithMe #MightyTogether #MentalHealth #Depression #ChronicDepression #Anxiety #Parentloss #Heartache #Christmas #ChristmasHeartache #holidaydepression