Hello 🙂 I have GAD, and it’s been a lot worse lately turning into depression, because I’ve been having so much guilt and shame. My parents/family moved from a city 🌃 in Canada to a smaller town 🇨🇦 🌳 all across Canada and it’s been quite the adjustment. The house here I’d bigger, nicer, cheaper but I don’t drive and counselling services and other things are 25 mins away, so I’ve felt really isolated, and top of that I’m studying to get my ged 📖 because I was almost done my high school diploma but here the system changes so it’s better for me to study for a ged than to take up all the courses needed.

But since we moved my dad works in thermoplastics, he had had to continue doing field jobs and continue working in the states or where we used to live which west Canada and we now live in eastern Canada 🇨🇦, but in November 2019 before covid-19 he had a temporary injury and had to go on employment insurance money help because he couldn’t go back to work, he has been looking for a job ever since but no real luck especially with the virus now, my mom had been on disability income for a while now 8 years or so because she has a rare heart attack in her 30’s that killed half of her heart 😞 she was lucky to survive and definitely a survivor. But she deals with depression ptsd and anxiety and hasn’t gotten a job ever since do my dad has been the one to provide for all of us for a while now.

We live in a town so it’s a little hard to come by jobs, worst case scenario we will just have to sell the house and relocate again maybe to the nearest city or elsewhere.

But I have been feeling such extreme anxiety/depression/ shame and so on because I feel such guilt and disappointment in myself that now when my family most needs me, I’m looking for jobs online or in person, I can’t step up because I have such work anxiety, that I have worked in the past before a few jobs for max 6-8 months each, I’m 20, but right now without counselling supports my anxiety Is skyrocketing, I’m seeing if there is online counselling for free, or what I can afford, but I just feel so silly and ashamed that I can’t easily be like other kids who just step up and help the family easily or just don’t struggle with fears, worries, catastrophic thoughts and so on

I’ll probably have to push myself to either get one regardless or to focus on my studying 100%.
But I feel so alone, stupid, ashamed and scared about what’s going to happen. #Depression #Anxiety #Work anxiety #failure #feelingashamed #dark place emotionally #Need counselling :c