healing

You can’t always see trauma.

It doesn’t always show up as bruises or broken bones.

Sometimes it shows up as anxiety that never seems to quiet down. Sometimes it shows up as addiction. Sometimes it shows up as pushing people away before they can hurt you.

Trauma often hides in the thoughts we carry about ourselves:

“I’m not good enough.”
“I can’t trust anyone.”
“Something must be wrong with me.”

For many individuals, trauma becomes something they wear every day—shaping how they see the world, how they connect with others, and how they survive.

Understanding trauma is not only essential for healing individuals; it is critical for transforming the systems that support them, including mental health services, addiction treatment, and child welfare.

Understanding Trauma

Trauma occurs when a person experiences events that overwhelm their ability to cope and leave lasting emotional, psychological, or physical effects.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) defines trauma as experiences that are emotionally harmful or life-threatening and have lasting adverse effects on functioning and well-being (SAMHSA, 2014).

Trauma can take many forms, including:

*Childhood abuse or neglect

*Domestic violence

*Exposure to addiction in the home

*Systemic discrimination

*Chronic instability or loss

For many individuals involved in mental health, addiction services, or child welfare systems, trauma is not a single event. It is often complex and cumulative, developing over time through repeated exposure to adversity.

Trauma Changes the Brain

Trauma does not just affect emotions—it affects biology.

When a person experiences danger, the body activates its survival response: fight, flight, or freeze. Stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline surge to prepare the body to respond.
While this response is adaptive in moments of immediate danger, chronic exposure to trauma can keep the nervous system in a prolonged state of survival.

Research shows trauma affects several critical areas of the brain:

*The amygdala, which processes fear, becomes overactive, increasing hypervigilance.

*The hippocampus, responsible for memory processing, may become impaired.

*The prefrontal cortex, which regulates decision-making and emotional control, can become less effective under chronic stress (van der Kolk, 2014).

Canadian research has also emphasized the long-term developmental effects of early adversity. Studies suggest that chronic childhood stress can disrupt neurological development and increase vulnerability to mental health disorders later in life (McEwen & McEwen, 2017).

Understanding these changes helps shift our perspective.

Instead of asking “What is wrong with this person?” we begin asking “What happened to this person?”

Trauma, Addiction, and Mental Health

The relationship between trauma and addiction is well established.

Many individuals struggling with substance use are not simply seeking escape or pleasure. They are often attempting to regulate overwhelming emotional pain.

The landmark Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study found that individuals who experienced multiple forms of childhood adversity were significantly more likely to develop substance use disorders, depression, suicide attempts, and chronic health conditions later in life (Felitti et al., 1998).

Canadian public health research reflects similar findings. The Public Health Agency of Canada has reported strong connections between childhood trauma, exposure to violence, and later mental health and substance use challenges (Public Health Agency of Canada, 2020).

For many individuals, addiction becomes a coping mechanism—an attempt to numb memories, quiet intrusive thoughts, or regulate emotional pain.

Understanding this connection is essential for compassionate and effective care.

Trauma Within Systems

Trauma is not only an individual experience—it is also shaped by social systems.

Across Canada, research shows that children involved in child welfare systems often have extensive histories of trauma, including exposure to abuse, neglect, family violence, and parental substance use (Esposito et al., 2017).

Yet systems designed to support vulnerable populations are not always trauma-informed.
Without understanding trauma, behaviours may be misinterpreted as:

*Defiance

*Manipulation

*Resistance

*Non-compliance

In reality, many of these behaviours are survival responses.

Trauma-informed approaches emphasize safety, empowerment, trust, and collaboration rather than punishment or judgment (Poole & Greaves, 2012). When systems adopt trauma-informed frameworks, individuals are more likely to engage in services and experience meaningful healing.

Personal Reflection

Trauma is something many people carry quietly.

Through both my professional work and my own life experiences, I have seen how trauma can shape people in ways the outside world rarely understands.

I have seen individuals labelled as “difficult,” “attention-seeking,” or “non-compliant,” when what they were really experiencing was unprocessed pain.

I have also seen how trauma can intertwine with addiction and mental health struggles, creating cycles that are incredibly difficult to break—especially when systems respond with judgment instead of compassion.

Healing does not happen because someone is told to “move on” or “be stronger.”

Healing happens when people feel safe enough to finally be understood.

Recovery is not about pretending trauma never happened. It is about learning how to process it, make meaning of it, and reclaim parts of ourselves that trauma tried to silence.

And sometimes the most powerful part of healing is realizing this:

You are not broken.
You adapted to survive.

Moving Forward: A Call for Compassion and Change

Trauma shapes people—but it does not have to define them.

When we begin to understand trauma, something shifts.
Shame begins to loosen its grip.
Judgment begins to soften.
And compassion begins to take its place.

But healing cannot happen through awareness alone.
Our communities, mental health systems, addiction services, and child welfare systems must move toward trauma-informed care—approaches that recognize the profound impact of trauma and respond with empathy rather than punishment.

Because when we stop asking “What is wrong with this person?” and start asking “What happened to this person?” we open the door to healing.

That shift has the power to transform lives.

It is also the foundation of the work I hope to continue through Rise Above Your Norm—creating spaces where people are seen, understood, and supported as they rebuild their lives.

Because healing is possible.
And no one should have to do it alone.

BigmommaJ
#MentalHealth #traumainformed #Healing

#artastherapy #Art #expression #Connection #Healing

Grief can take many forms, arise for different reasons, and last for long periods of time. It doesn’t always look the same for everyone, and it can show up in ways we don’t always expect.

💌 Let’s hold space for one another today. If you’re up to it, share in the comments or leave encouraging words, validation, or even a heart as a gentle reminder that none of us are alone. 💌

What are you grieving right now?

Share with us below. ♥️

#Grief #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #PTSD #Healing #Suicide #CheckInWithMe

#artastherapy #MentalHealth #Grief #Relationships #Loss #Healing #impermanence #Life #change #Art

I always knew being near natural water had this affect. But I didn’t realize how much just the sound of the moving water positively affected me. The visuals are definitely calming for me too, but the sound may have the greatest affect, probably because I can really feel it. It helps me relax and to breathe more normally, especially with ocean sounds— somehow, the rythym of the waves just reminds me to breathe 🌊

This reality allows me to listen to recorded versions of these sounds and experience the same affect I get when at the ocean or a river, or when it’s raining. Which is incredibly helpful because I cannot travel or spend as much time outdoors as I once did.

#grounding #Meditation #MentalHealth #rythym #Nature #earth #copingskills #Healing #artastherapy #NaturesArt

While I was doing inpatient rehabilitation I encountered some people who expressed frustration that I seemed to be recovering faster than they were.

I reminded them that their surgery was different to mine, we have different ages and every person’s journey is different.

I encouraged them to keep pressing on. And there were days when pain management seemed impossible and they would encourage me.

We tend to judge people on their actions and judge ourselves on our intentions.

Comparison leads to misery. We never really know what is going on in people’s lives. Facebook and Instagram tend to focus on the good times people experience so they are a bad gauge of reality.

You matter. You are loved. You are unique and that is absolutely marvellous!!!

There is a quiet strength in the words “I will not rescue you.”

At first, they can feel sharp—almost dismissive—especially for those of us who have spent a lifetime surviving trauma, addiction, mental illness, or systems that failed to protect us. But when read through a healing lens, these words are not abandonment. They are empowerment.

A Medicine Woman’s Prayer does not deny pain.

It refuses to define us by it.

You Are Not Powerless

So many people who come from trauma—especially childhood trauma, child welfare involvement, domestic violence, or addiction—are conditioned to believe they are broken.

Systems often reinforce this belief by focusing on deficits instead of resilience.

But healing does not begin with being rescued. It begins with remembering that you have always had agency—even when it was stripped from you.

The line “For you are not powerless” speaks directly to those who were silenced, controlled, or made to feel small. Trauma teaches learned helplessness. Healing teaches reclamation.

You Are Not Broken

This may be the hardest truth to accept. When we have been diagnosed, institutionalized, addicted, abused, or repeatedly told we are “too much” or “not enough,” brokenness becomes an identity. But trauma is not a character flaw—it is an injury.
And injuries heal.

“I will not fix you. For you are not broken.” This is a reminder that healing is not about becoming someone new. It is about returning to who you were before the world taught you to disconnect from yourself.

Healing Is Not Done To You
One of the most damaging myths in mental health and recovery spaces is the belief that someone else must save us.

While support is essential—therapy, community, medication, treatment—true healing is participatory.

No one heals for you

The medicine woman does not position herself as the cure. She offers presence. She offers companionship. She offers safety—but not control.

This mirrors trauma-informed practice at its core:

Empowerment. Choice. Collaboration. Trust.

Walking Through the Darkness Together

Healing does not mean avoiding darkness. It means not walking through it alone. “I will walk with you through the darkness, as you remember your light.”

This line reflects what real support looks like—whether in therapy, recovery, parenting, or community work. Not fixing. Not rescuing. Not judging.
Just walking beside someone as they reconnect with their own strength.

This is especially important for those navigating addiction and recovery. Substance use often begins as an attempt to soothe pain, regulate emotions, or survive unbearable circumstances.

Recovery is not about shame—it is about reconnection.

A Reflection from My Own Journey

As someone who has lived this work—not just studied it—I know how tempting it is to wait for someone to save you. I also know how devastating it feels when no one does.

But I have learned this:

The moment I stopped seeing myself as broken, I started healing.

The moment I stopped waiting to be rescued, I started rebuilding.

Not alone—but empowered.

This Is the Work of Rise Above Your Norm

This prayer reflects the foundation of the work I am building—personally and professionally. Healing is not about dependency. It is about sovereignty.

Whether you are surviving mental illness, recovering from addiction, navigating trauma, or rebuilding after loss—your light was never extinguished.

It was waiting for you to remember it.

A Call to Action

If you are reading this and feel unseen, unworthy, or tired of trying to be “fixed,” let this be your reminder:

You are whole—even in your healing.

You are powerful—even in your pain.

And you do not need to be rescued to rise.

You only need someone willing to walk with you until you remember your own light.
—
BigmommaJ
#Healing #Survivor #MentalHealth #Addiction

Change the way you think, you'll change the way you talk.

Change the way you talk, you'll change the way you live.

Change the way you live, you'll change your entire life.

Real change comes from within. It all starts with your mindset. I know its so hard to do this. I've been working on changing my mind about myself for years. I had major automatic negative thoughts about myself and such low self esteem, it completely shaped how I thought about myself and how I lived my life. Now I think positive about myself and its changing my entire life for the best. I had to start with my thoughts and changing my own mind.

#Healing #change #Trauma