impulsebuys

I ended up calling out of work because I was so drained from being so miserable last night. I couldn’t muster the energy to get out of bed let alone be at work around other humans.

I always feel very anxious when I call out. I feel like my coworkers and bosses think I am faking or just being lazy or something even though I legitimately have signed FMLA documentation by my psychiatrist stating I have major depressive disorder and anxiety and some days I just literally can’t function no matter how hard I try... I still feel awful whenever I call out though.

In an effort to make myself feel better I impulse bought an iPad Air off Groupon because it was a pretty great deal. I draw and have been wanting a tablet to paint digitally in hopes of making me enjoy art again. I am excited but I also feel terrible for buying something I don’t really need... I have a lot of intense anxiety over spending money especially if it isn’t a necessity.

I do hope when it gets here I will enjoy it and use it a bunch it will turn out to be a good purchase.
#Depression #Anxiety #impulsebuys #ImposterSyndrome

Tonight I cried over a boiled egg of all things in the last 4 days I’ve had about 6 hrs sleep yet I can’t switch off everything is making me angry impulsive spending is out of control no meds as pharmacy refuses to dispense until a see a dr as during depressive phase about a month ago I came off them yet all I’m getting is psych team is oversubscribed #Impulsivity #impulsebuys #nosleep #Tomuchenergy #angryanxiety

So I was going through my mobile banking texts this morning and I found some charges for Wish that I didn't remember. After checking it seems that at 6 a.m. on Saturday morning I ordered 5 sleep masks, 99 gel pen refills (because less than that would be crazy), and a 8 bit screwdriver (looks real high quality). Lol I keep trying to tell people about my impulses and they don't get it. I have even given up my debit card and ordered a new one because I have the number memorized. I don't hold any cash. I'm trying to not spend money but then family comes to me to sell stuff on websites and give me some of the money when I sell something. They don't know that they can't do that, even tho I have told them. How do I get people to understand this?