morningthoughts

I came home around 4:30 am, although being tired, I ended up not going to bed. My follow up for my mental health is coming up soon. My sleep pattern has been completely out of wack because I’ve been coming home late from work. I have been feeling better since being on medication. I still have dips every now and then, but other than that I’m enduring. I have been thinking about taking time off from work or asking for a doctors note for time off for a couple of weeks. I still struggle with emptiness from time to time along with my sense of identity. For the longest time, down to this day, I have zero perception of how people feel about me. What I mean is that I’m not aware if I person genuinely likes me, yet I can tell if someone dislikes me. Hopefully there will be more adjustments to be made, and some questions answered soon. #MentalHealth #Depression #identitydisturbance #lowselfesteem #LateNightThoughts #morningthoughts #feelingaloneandlost #tired #struggling

Can feel like a tidal wave, something that I'm drowning in.
Can feel like the freckle on my left hand, always there but unnoticed.
Can feel like a cheap zen fountain, a steady stream, a loop, of endless mental chatter.
Can feel like an abusive partner, I hate you, you're worthless, never good enough.
Can feel like an energizer bunny drill sergeant- gotta go go go!

Can feel like a rubber band pulled to its limit, tense, ready to snap.

Can feel like tears clinging to the ledge of my eye lids.
Can feel like a bow and arrow I point at someone else.

Can feel like you are a stray Cheerio in a bowl of fruit loops, unwanted, out of place.

Can feel like ground is crumbling beneath my two feet.

Can feel like craving connection but texting "no I'm too busy tonight."

#Anxiety #CopingWithAnxiety #morningthoughts

You haven't "messed up" this week already. Every moment offers a chance for a fresh start. Be gracious with yourself, and always remember you're doing the best you can.

#morningthoughts

#Anxiety #Depression #MentalHealth #ChronicIllness #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder