#feelingaloneandlost #overwhelmedbylife #Divorce #BrainFog #confused #breakdown #Depression #Insomnia #Procrastination
Been feeling really lost. Used to go through life happy and active.Very motivated to workout and enjoy art and nature. Outdoors. Lots of Traveling and very functional. Made some choices about work. Felt overwhelmed as a supervisor. Quit and went to different company then found myself laid off for a long time. Then conflicts between wife and my immediate family triggered a mental breakdown. Separation, moved out. Insomnia. Guilt. Self blame. Constant Suicidal thoughts. A week in mental hospital. A year and a half later, many meds, TMS. I still have trouble sleeping. Making simple decisions. Barely hanging on. Not thinking clearly. Feel like I’m in a constant fog. No stability. No roots. Everything is in storage. Alone in a hotel room, currently trying to work some labor job. Feel clumsy and everything feels wrong. Job is dirty and bad for health. At this point in my life (50) I feel like I should be so much better than this. Feel like a failure. Traveling and pretending things are ok. Not organized. Can’t seem to move forward. Can’t seem to create a change or a routine or a vision of my future. Can’t sleep well. No motivation or joy in activities or outdoors. So much confusion and self doubt. Want to be positive but feel like I have lost my way and my cognitive ability. I must make big decisions about divorce. About work. About life. Don’t know what to do or how long I can keep this up! Keep thinking like I want a do over. How to regain control of my life?