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So, I woke up this morning a little discombobulated. Then I was pushed and snapped at by my hubby. Then I left the house, slightly under protest, to drive with him and his daughter 45 minutes to his mom's house to help her with a few chores. I have my armor (my fave jeans, t-shirt, and light sweater, with my pentagon necklace and hematite bracelet), I have my mask on (I did my makeup and hair). We did the chores, ran to A&W for lunch, and now we're at Costco... I'm down to 1 1/2 spoons. I hope that this is our last stop. Just... A rough day. #Anxiety #GenerealizedAnxietyDisorder #SocialAnxiety #possibleagoraphobe

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Stick a fork in me, I’m all out of spoons

I had to attend a state funeral on Friday that lasted all day, as my husband was part of the main party. Saturday our children and grandson were in town as our grandson was to be christened on Sunday. We ran errands during the day, and then went to a lovely dinner hosted by a dear, dear friend so I didn’t have to do a dinner. Sunday was so lovely. The baby behaved beautifully, his reception went well, as did the luncheon afterwards. We bid farewell to all last evening and I collapsed into a heap.
I know. I did enough for 6 people, as my husband reminds me.
I don’t mean to whine- and I know to this group I’m not really - but even with careful attention to pain meds and resting I am way behind my pain curve. I can work on that. But what scares me is I have never felt my legs feel so weak. I’ve spent the morning in bed resting.

I don’t have a complete diagnosis. No one clearly knows what’s going on with me. It all started with an accident in 2009 that caused an annular tear at L5. I received an epidural with the mold contaminated steroid but didn’t contract meningitis. At the time of the injection, before anyone knew about the mold, I was acutely ill for a week with a severe headache. In 2011 I had an L5S1 ALIF with less than optimal results. Since then I have been in continued pain management diagnosed with CRPS and migraine. I have a Tarlov Cyst, but everyone seems to think they are asymptomatic. I don’t think mine is. Now there is question of MS and cervical spine involvement. I have to walk with a walking stick. Most of my doctors are surprised I am still walking. Gut strength. I won’t quit! But today, I’m so out of spoons…

#CRPS #TarlovCysts #SpinalFusion #needspoons