Flashbacks of Childhood abuse Trigger warning: childhood sexual abuse
I’ve been doing some reading on the inner child theory and it applies to my case. I was sexually abused as a child and now that I actually remembered after years of not remembering, all these flashbacks keep coming back. I’m having nightmares and I’m afraid of my abuser who is still around. My stomach feels nauseated on the weekend when I see them most and I use marijuana to calm me down and self medicate feelings of fear and anxiety. My inner child is crying out. He’s afraid that he’s not safe and that no one is going to protect him from his abuser. Interestingly enough the only thing that calms me down is hugging my favorite plushie. I feel like I’m 10 years old again and I’m terrified of my abuser and no one is there to protect me again but as a 32 year old transman. I’m not sure what I wanted out of this post. If anyone has experience with this much obliged.