workrelatedstress

So. It’s been some time since I visited. I have been experiencing increased anxiety and stress prior to leaving for work. So much, that it makes me physically ill (because I have been ruminating all night about how my day will go). I realize how unhealthy this is and signed up for our local partial hospitalization program for two weeks. I am now in week 2 and will be discharged from program Friday. Even though I am in therapy every other week, I did not realize how debilitating it was getting for me to even function at work. The PHP has been a great reminder of CBT and coping skills. A few I feel confident to utilize when I am suffering a mental crisis. I’m thankful I participated in the program, for work related reasons. I work in healthcare, but don’t always take care of myself as I should. As we direct our patients.

I have also been speaking to my therapists regarding my bipolar II rapid cycling diagnosis. I believe when I was diagnosed, I met the criteria. Fast forward 20 years later, I’m not so sure I fit that criteria as my manic episodes are more “fleeing moments,” and very short lived because I am cognizant when I feel I am “starting to slip.” I am more creature of habit, routine and when either is thrown off balance, it is difficult for me to adjust. I have a couple OCD tendencies, as well. And, a different personality. It takes me a very long time to trust someone. I more observe than participate, at times. Start to disassociate when I am under an extreme amount of stress. Sigh. I don’t know what that labels me, but I don’t believe it is bipolar II.

Good to be here with likeminded people who might have insight. I welcome any and all! Thank you for reading. #MightyTogether #Depression #Anxiety #workrelatedstress #PTSD #Bipolar2

I just finished my one week vacation from work, got lots of rest, but now am suffering from insomnia. My migraines had subsided during my vacation but are definitely trying to come back. 🤕 Meaning, my job is hazardous to my health? Not the job, but the people I work with. I am still struggling with other issues and am trying to push through them, but it is bringing up old demons and nightmares. I think I 🤔 am going to need a separate therapist for everything that I have been through. Maybe?