ADHD in girls

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    We're coming up on my birthday and it's a different one. It the first one in 8 years without my abusive ex. I used to really dread my birthdays. It used to be like this one day where he was kind, loving, and attentive.

    He'd pay attention to me, ask me questions, and even check in how I was going. He'd emphasise how it was all about me and just be so loving and kind. It was like he knew me deeply and he cared for me. But then the switch would flick. And that guy would be gone.

    I think it's the ease with which he flicked on and off this switch that made me hate it so much. It felt so fake or even worse, that this is how he could be, how he could treat me, but he decided everyday not to.

    He could be loving but he decided everyday not to be. He could be sweet and supportive but he decided every day to not be that man. Instead he decided that because my birthday was a special day he would make it special. He would make it special by being kind instead of cruel, for that one day.

    Not that kind though. I wasn't allowed birthday cake because he would be 'tempted'.

    Domestic abuse is hard. Everyday I struggle with the shame I feel for staying so long. For letting him treat me how he did. For not standing up for myself.

    I'm so glad I found the strength to finally leave. This isn't how I thought my life would turn out but hey, at least this year I can eat cake on my birthday.

    #Anxiety #Depression #ADHDInGirls

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    This is myself and my ex (we’ll call him D). D and I dated about 2 years ago for about a year and a half (started in 2019). I gave up EVERYTHING for him. I was in a severe mental state, suffering from PPD, PPA, and PTSD as well as untreated Bipolar 2 and ADHD. My ex fiancé (we will call him M) and I had a child in late 2018. We were living with his toxic family, he had total control over my life, I had no job, no license, no real family to go to, he made me completely isolated. Fast forward to early 2019, I met D a long time before that via a “friend” and we stayed in touch minorly over the years. We really started connecting around late 2018. By the time 2019 hit M had given up on me and his family just became more and more toxic. I started meeting up with D in secret. We would just talk, nothing else. But early 2019 I told M I was in love with D, he didn’t even seem to care. In April I ended up going off the deep end, I wanted to kill myself. So I went to the only family I had left and I stayed there for a few days. Over the course of those few days M broke off our engagement, which hurt at first but wasn’t so bad considering we hadn’t loved one another for years but I knew nothing else and was completely dependent on him, so I stayed. I was homeless at that point, I had gotten a job that I worked 18.5 hours a week at and I was spending my nights in D’s car or on his drunk mothers couch which she started charging me $400 a month for. Finally I got an apartment, sorta. M got full legal custody of our son due to my mental state. I was able to take the bus and Uber to my son and work. D would sometimes drive me. Sometime in early 2020 I moved in with D and COVID hit. I couldn’t see my son due to his family having medical issues. My mom was diagnosed with cancer on my birthday and died exactly 2 months later. I was the only one with her when she died. She was at home, I was taking care of her. Giving her meds, changing her diapers, trying to get her to eat. It was horrible and watching her die was traumatic to say the least. We buried her next to her parents and my aunt and I went through her whole apartment. It was so sad and I didn’t know how to handle that. I started going off the deep end again, hurting myself really badly, getting into petty arguments, shutting out work and my son. I ended up in the hospital. In the parking lot D said to me “if you go in there you’ll never get your son back.” I was so numb I didn’t even care. I did my time and got better but as soon as I came home I was depressed again. I packed up my stuff and moved in with a friend for a few months till I got a place of my own. When I came back up here I got back together with D, but he was just using me for sex. He ghosted me after a few months and started seeing someone else. I was heartbroken. After a few months he told me we didn’t work because I had a son and he never wanted to be a parent. I cried. I had never felt a love like I had with D and to this day I still love him. Fast forward to now, D and his girlfriend broke up a few weeks ago. He had rearranged his whole life to be with her, like I somewhat had with him, and now he was lost. He turned to me for comfort. We have a mutual understanding this time that he is solely using me as a crutch till he can figure himself out. But I’m so torn. I still love him but he doesn’t love me. I was so happy with him, I thought, but now I’m not so sure. He’s lost some of his values that we shared. For example: he’s started taking edibles and I and strictly against getting high due to personal reasons. And he used to agree with me on that. He’s cold and detached but then sometimes he seems like the old D I used to know. I don’t want to separate from him again because I want to help him stop hurting, even for a blip. But it’s toxic to me. I know the right answer is to let him go and move on, but I just can’t. I’m not strong enough. I love him and I hate it. #PTSD #Bipolar2Disorder #PostpartumDepression #PostpartumAnxiety #ADHD #ADHDInGirls #toxiclove #toxicrelationship #Abuse

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    people with bpd also have adhd #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #ADHDInGirls #ADHD #DBT

    According to some studies, 14 percent of people diagnosed with ADHD in childhood went on to receive a BPD diagnosis later in life. They estimate that anywhere from 18 percent to 34 percent of adults treated for ADHD also have BPD. Some personality traits can indicate whether you have both.

    Although the relationship between BPD and ADHD makes it more difficult to diagnose and treat, there are still treatment options. People who suspect or have been diagnosed with BPD, ADHD, or both can effectively manage their symptoms with the help of a psychologist or psychiatrist.

    How to improve emotion regulation

    Emotion regulation is an important life skill that can enhance learning and improve educational outcomes. Developmental research shows that the ability to regulate emotions improves with age. In neuroimaging studies, emotion regulation skills have been linked to the recruitment of many prefrontal brain regions involved in cognitive control and executive function, which mature later in development. In this review, we discuss the regulation of negative and positive emotions, the role of other people in channeling our emotional responses, and potential applications of this work in education.

    Because emotions can enhance or hinder learning, the ability to regulate your own and others' emotions can contribute to successful educational outcomes. Emotion regulation is an emotion-cognitive interaction in which cognitive control systems are thought to help suppress or enhance negative and positive emotions (Figure 1). Children and adolescents may be more difficult to regulate because brain regions associated with cognitive control structures (such as the prefrontal cortex) may mature more slowly than structures associated with emotional responses (such as the amygdala and ventral striatum) own emotions. Weaker or less organized functional and structural connectivity between these brain regions during childhood may also lead to increased difficulty with emotion regulation [55-. However, available data suggest a disconnect between negative and positive affective domains: Children and adults on disgust Responses to stimuli were similar, and it was more difficult for children to regulate responses to them; by contrast, children were more sensitive than adults to rewards, and people of all ages could regulate responses to rewards. Of course, personality factors such as depression and anxiety, as well as situational factors outside of the classroom, such as stress or abuse, can increase emotional reactivity or impair prefrontal cortex function, both of which can make emotion regulation more difficult.

    Different ways to regulate emotion

    Taking control of our emotions is a way to regulate, control or change them. But it's not the only way. Accepting our emotions or doing something non-emotional are other ways to change emotions without directly controlling them. In fact, emotional control may not always work, and it may not always be beneficial. For example, certain types of emotional control, such as repressing -- or hiding your feelings -- can have long-term negative effects on your well-being.

    Some people are better at regulating their emotions than others. They have high emotional intelligence and understand their own inner experiences and the feelings of others. Although they may appear to be "quiet by nature," these individuals can also have negative emotions. They have just developed coping strategies that allow them to self-regulate difficult emotions.

    Emotion regulation involves managing our emotions in order to maintain healthy emotional states

    Emotion regulation is defined as the ability to influence a person's emotional state. It can involve increasing positive emotions, decreasing negative emotions, or both. Generally, it involves changing your thoughts or behavior, sometimes consciously and sometimes unconsciously. For example, you can focus on a silver lining or pull yourself out of a difficult situation to regulate your emotions. Regulating your emotions with healthy strategies will make you feel better and help you recover from stressful experiences faster. Therefore, emotion regulation is sometimes viewed as a coping mechanism.

    Other researchers use a broader definition of emotion regulation, seeing it as a set of skills that help keep the emotional system healthy and functioning. Because emotions are not absolute and permanent, we can learn to adjust our emotions, their intensity, when they arise, and how we respond to them. A key aspect of emotion regulation is that it occurs when goals are activated.

    What are your tools for emotional regulation? How do you self soothe?

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    Is it possible to have a normal life without Meds?

    It’s been a few years that I’ve been on Adderal and at the beginning it’s been helping but since I started, my dosage has increased. I hate that it’s suppresses my appetite. On my off days I’m exhausted from the meds being active 5 days of the week. I want to stop taking Adderal all together. Does anyone have any tips or tricks that help them cope without medication? #ADHD #ADHDInGirls


    Awaking sober

    I woke up sober today and it feels good, I write it down here because I want to remember it.
    Also, midday sunlight doesn’t look so violent today and the wind smells good. Hope the day continues to be calm.
    One day at a time. #AlcoholAbuse #Autism #ADHD #ADHDInGirls #Anxiety #ChronicDepression #Selflove

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    Venting #Depression #spouse #ADHDInGirls

    These past few months have been very hard for me. I have so sad, lonely, and lost. I feel like empty and not enough. I lost my uncle who was more like my father back in may and I never got to say goodbye. I’m also dealing with a spouse of 13 years who has been taking drugs more often. Ive been trying my hardest to keep everyone in my family happy while I lost myself in this depression. Also I gave this man my heart only for him to tell me that while he was at work he meet a girl and they started flirting and she gave him attention that he felt he wasn’t getting from me. He would come home and tell me he feels like I have another guy when it was him. They work together and he flat out told me he liked the attention she gives him. What I can’t figure out is what the more can I give this man? I gave him my whole heart only for him to rip it apart. Then the part that I can forgive is that while I’m in the church crying for my uncle he was sitting outside with out Amazing son on the phone with her. Idk what to do somedays I want to pack a bag for my son and I get in the car n leave. My son is at the age where he know something is wrong and begs me to stay with his dad, he wants to have one family not two houses. So I stay for my boy but I’m definitely not happy I’m building a wall around my tired heart so when am ready I’ll be strong enough. Most day I cry begging anyone listening to help me be stronger to put myself first. I’ve spent years basically my whole life catering to everyone but me. I have to learn self love. It should be 1. Me 2. My Son 3. Family 4.relationship
    The sad thing is last Wednesday I felt myself slipping into the darkness so I wrote in my journal and I even tried talking to him but he instead chose drugs or me once again. Pouring my heart out to this man is a broken record. This is the life of loving someone who has an addiction disease. The drug comes before everything.

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    I wish I could feel like I have worth #MentalHealth

    I have #ADHD and am a #Trauma survivor.

    I’ve struggled with my self esteem since first grade. That’s when I first started to notice I was different. That’s when I started to feel like I wasn’t good enough.

    After years of #Abuse I became even more down on myself. I felt like I deserved it.

    I’ve started to recover from that but my self worth has only gotten more complicated in recent years.

    I teach high school. I threw my heart and soul into it. I love my kids so much.

    But as a #neurodivergent person, it’s such a hard job for me. And with the way the world has been it’s gotten much harder.

    My mental health was shot by the end of this year. Next year I’m pivoting away from teaching.

    And this has destroyed my self esteem even further.

    If I can’t hack it as a teacher, a job I put so much of myself into, a job I really felt gave me something I could bring to the table, what is my worth?

    What do I bring to the table? I don’t have anything I’m good at. I don’t have anything I provide to the world.

    I believe every person has value. I wish I could feel that way about myself.

    #CheckInWithMe #ADHDInGirls

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    Hmm...🤔.... #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #Depression #ADHD #ADHDInGirls #CPTSD And the list may go on and on....

    ......And all of a sudden I snap out of it and slowly realise I've been dissosiading for a week or two.... Also really in need indeed to shower...

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    #ADHDInGirls #MoodDisorders my experience with ADHD and Mood swings ig

    at the age of 7 I realize that something was wrong or that was my mom said about me I wasn't really happy or sad I always have mood swings but it wasn't my thing it was something else I thought after I get in trouble of things like the one time I punched a kid for my pen at the time I was not really thinking and the time I snapped back at my mom and the next day I forgot about it all and when to school or turned back into a happy person I was those now at the age at 14 was trigger points of my ADHD of me forgetting and my mood swings in like something Bipolar or anger issues and I hope this dont make anyone uncomfortable....