So I had a really hard time falling asleep tonight, but actually managed to sleep. But at 4am, I woke up because of bad rainout in my APAP machine. For those of you who don't have CPAPs or APAPs, that's when water gets in the hose and bubbles loudly and makes it hard to breathe. So I took my mask off and was showered with a ton of water from my humidifier tank. I don't think I can go back to sleep, but don't want to be up. I'm staying over at a friend's apartment and don't want to wake people up, but don't want to just sit here doing nothing. And my back and head are hurting a lot. This is not the start I wanted for my day.
Ok so sleep apnea isn’t the funkiest of problems. It doesn’t get the press that other things do. And if I’m being honest is probably the easiest problem I have to deal with.
But the noise.....
Ok so I have always had a problem with noise. As a youngster I was tested over and over for what we now know as tinnitus. I have enjoyed loud concerts and been around racing engines, one way or another, all my life. My hearing, apart from tinnitus, is spot on. How my brain interprets that noise s a different matter.
But that’s not the reason for this post......
ITS THE BLINKIN NOISE.....
So anyone that uses one of these machines will know, the machine is silent, or so it seems. But strap that animal harness to your head, with that nose bag on and it’s like your standing in an air tunnel. The noise is horrendous. Put in earplugs and it sounds like the noise is coming from the bowels of the earth.....in fact the wind needed to put out the fires of hell.
I tried putting soothing sounds on my Alexa device. Thinking this might lull me....no hope. To hear it I had to turn it up. Kinda going against the noise thing.
I tried wireless buds ffs to say the least was no good and the same could be said about headphones.....but I did try.
I looked a those Bose sleepbuds......seriously expensive and then I found out they are not noise cancelling in the way I would like and they play sounds to lull you to sleep. Again against the noise thing along with the other tried and tested noise emitting apparatus.
This morning, after dealing with the dogs, my normal formalities and my medication.....I fell onto the bed. Usually. If I feel like this I would put my mask on and sleep.
Today I relished the silence. I mean other than the ever present tinnitus .....it was silent. For me a complete rarity. Is been so many years since I’d heard silence. And I miss it like an old best forever friend. Like snuggling, embracing......like real.....nothing. There was something restful just there in my grasp......
And then it was gone.
Miss you xx
thank you cpap. You are one of my life saver. #CPAPMachine
I have always had an absurdly easy time falling asleep. In the car? Out in seconds. On the bus? Can't keep my eyes open. Reading a book? Forget about it. It's only gotten worse since I got older. I've fallen asleep in meetings and at my desk. I've almost nodded off behind the wheel at a red light and I often fall asleep mid-sentence in the evenings. During these naps I often dream, which I always thought was normal but apparently not.
I got a home sleep study and I was diagnosed with #SleepApnea and started sleeping with a #CPAPMachine . It helped, but I was still tired. I got started on Adderall for #ADHD , but I was still tired. Now I'm starting to strongly suspect I have #Narcolepsy . I can't imagine what it would be like to feel truly awake all day, and not have to refuel with coffee all the time (which barely works). I haven't experienced cataplexy to my recollection, but I am also taking meds already that are used to treat cataplexy. I am hoping to get a referral for a in lab sleep study from my GP when I see her on Monday.
I changed jobs for a lot of good reasons, but better health insurance coverage wasn't one of them. I used to work for the State of Wisconsin, and even though our union was destroyed back in 2011 we still had the best health insurance in the area. All the specialties, all the tests, all the medical supplies were covered. I never had to worry about whether or not my insurance would pay for the care that I needed. My new job has done great things for my mental health and my overall life satisfaction, exception when it comes to insurance coverage.
My new health insurance does not cover my psychiatrist my therapist, the DME provider where I got my #CPAPMachine the pre-op appointment for my #TotalHysterectomy and my testosterone, which is now my only source of sex hormone.
The thing that drives me absolutely crazy is on more than one occasion I checked to see if a given provider or service would be covered, and I was assured that they will be. Lies, all lies.
Anyone who says the American health insurance system isn't broken has the 1 in a million really great insurance, or else is rolling in cash so the costs don't even register.