diamond

“I won’t cry cause I know I’ll never be lonely, for you are the stars to me, you are the light I follow. Til I see you again” #CarrieUnderwood

That picture right up there means so many different things to me. Sure it looks like it was a lot of fun and you would most definitely be right about that. But besides the fun we had that day it reminds me of the woman whom I love, miss, admire, as well as draw my strength from in times of weakness and despair, hopelessness and sorrow.
That is my Aunt Debbie. She passed away in October 2017 from uterine cancer tragically. She had just turned 6 two weeks prior. I say tragically because we didn’t know that she would sit in her living room one night, watching tv and suddenly be gone. Getting a phone call at 12:27 am from my uncle crying that she’s gone and to please get there as fast as we can. I had never lost anymore that I was so incredibly close to so this was completely devastating to say the very least.
Her name was the first that came out of my mouth. “deba”. Lol, sorry mom. Her nickname for me was “Sweetles”. Today I proudly display that nickname in a beautiful tattoo on my chest. She was my mother’s younger sister, best friend and other half.
She bravely fought #BreastCancer at 37 and then went on to kick #CervicalCancer ass in 2006. She was on the train when the Ling Island railroad shooter rang out dozens of shots in a train car that was headed home to Long Island. She got right back on the train that next morning. Talk about #strength and #courage . She wasn’t about to let cancer or that shooter uproot her incredible fortitude and independence, not about to bow down and let them win.
She was my best friend, my mentor, my shoulder to lean on, my voice of reason, sometimes putting me back into the real world when I was a teenager and as I grew up into a woman. She became the one I looked up at in awe and for inspiration and guidance.
She worked for a company called #Amway working her way up the ranks in hopes of becoming a “Diamond” as they named it one day. Little did she know that she would go on to become a motivational speaker, mentor and idol to thousands in the process. Speaking all over the country and on collections of DVD’S and CD’s.
She had a powerful yet gentle presence. Extremely uplifting and supportive, intelligent with some wit thrown in there and she always wore a smile that let you know she was such a special person.
She went on to achieve that goal of becoming a #diamond a week before her death. I look at pictures and see just how appreciative, excited, and proud she was of attaining her goals. Doing so on stage in front of a sold out major arena in Virginia.
Today as I struggle through my illness and my mothers illness I find strength and courage from her that I didn’t think I could ever possess. A fire deep down telling me to get back up and fight. Peace in knowing that I can handle this just like all of the things that my aunt once conquered and so I shall...