Most days I feel like I am an imposter in the chronic illness space. My bloods/xrays are not that ba, but bad enough to show somethings wrong. But then why the pain, fatique, brain fog, blackouts, nerve pain, stiffness. If I'm not that bad, why do I feel miserable? The thought that this can get worse is overbearing! I look normal, I'm generally a helpful, talkative, able human being. So I feel like an imposter. I feel like I am not sick enough and don't belong. I have to fight to get heard by my docters, my friends and family don't understand. I'm tired of explaining. I now know that I don't absorb medications, THIS SUCKS! All I want is to be pain free, have energy, sparkle and enjoy my life. I'm in limbo as I can do neither whole heartedly. I am not deathly ill, neither am I capable to have a normal everyday life without the constant reminder this is hard, this is painful, this is exhausting. So yes, I feel like an imposter.
Don't get me wrong, I am so incredibly greatful for the things I can do and that I am not gravely ill. I am so incredibly thankful that I am not as bad off as a lot of people on this platform. All I want is for my current symptoms to be treated so I can continue with a normal life.
So yes I have imposter syndrome and I don't know how to overcome that! Not healthy enough to belong, not ill enough either!
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