The short answer is Yes! But it won't to be normal normal but more of a semi normal because you still have to deal with your intrusive thoughts, dissociative amnesia moments, fear of abandonment and the rest of the bpd characteristics. But even though you can not focus on it sometimes long enough to blend in with the people around you, go to work, shop at the mall #BPD #MentalIllness
Dissociative symptoms are common in BPD, including memory loss (amnesia) for certain time periods, events, and people, a sense of being detached from the self, depersonalization, derealization, perception of people and things as distorted and unreal, blurred sense of identity, and hearing voices. #dissociativeamnesia
Dissociation is a common coping strategy for dealing with a traumatic situation. When you experience a threat to your well being, the brain can cleverly check out, allowing you to endure the traumatic experience without being conscious of it.
There are several different types of Dissociation as Anna Lente explains in this article: themighty.com/2018/06/types-of-dissociation
Have you ever experienced any of these? If so, did your experience match the descriptions in this article?
Personally I have experienced depersonalization, dissociative amnesia and flashbacks. My depersonalization was the personification of an “out of body experience.” The dissociative amnesia has made it challenging to reconstruct narrative memories of my trauma, which frustrates me in therapy when I feel triggered and can’t figure out why. My flashbacks are both emotional and somatic, something we will discuss in more detail later this month.
I hate days like this. Today is one of those days. I went to bed last night at 8:20 and woke up at 9-something. At least 12 hours, but completely unrested. I must of had a marathon of nocturnal seizures. I woke up with ringing-cloggy ear feeling, my brain was short circuited, my speech was slurred, and I thought I could go about my day. WRONG! It's ended up being a day in bed.
I've known for a few years that I have dissociative amnesia about experiences in my younger years. I have accepted the holes in my memory but when I had that massive trigger back in June, some long forgotten memories started floating back while I slept. A lot of things happen while I sleep, memories return as nightmares and pent up anger emerges as bad dreams, so it makes sense I have seizures while sleeping.
I had a thorough amount MRI's and EEG's and scans. It was confirmed I do not have epilepsy. I have dissociative seizures. It is another layer for preventing my memories to come back. Basically, when a part of my brain is ready to release a secret another part says "nope" and ZAPP!
Now, I am left to ponder: 1. healing is a process where I face my demons and work through them. 2. I am literally electrocuting myself to keep things hidden. 3. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO ME? 4. Do I really want to remember???
I feel so tired.
Trying to come out of dissociation and my mind and body are wrecked by over stimulation. I've been in dissociation consistently for over 15 years. I can't remember all of my trauma and I have dissociative amnesia. It's all been getting worse. I thought I had a handle on my symptoms but it was just that my brain was enveloping me in such a deep dissociative state that I didn't have much to have to fight. Now, its all hitting me at once. I don't know what to do or where to start. I feel utterly helpless and useless. I can't go into walmart without being overwhelmed and over stimulated. I don't know what to do. When I was told about the Mighty I felt a little bit of peace knowing there are others that are fighting mental health battles like me. I'm faced with anxiety and depression and trauma and ptsd. Thanks for reading
I'm still new here and I feel weird because it's like everyone here just became friends. Like, you guys are my friends you just don't know it yet. Even though I think that's funny it makes me feel like I'm kind of an awkward stalker. And I have to remind myself that I shouldn't be so open and trusting.... that's what gets me in trouble. I don't know what to. I like getting on here and feel comforted, supported, and free of the judgements I've become accustomed to... but are you guys really a community I am ok in? Am I really accepted here? How do I know I shouldn't just be quiet and observe? Maybe I should do that but then I'm robbing myself of the relief I get from talking to people. Damn. This is so hard. I really don't know what to do. #PTSD #TraumaticBrainInjury #dissociativeamnesia #Depression #Awkward #whoamIanyway