Is our marriage a sham?
I was recently diagnosed with QBPD, it has been a 36 year struggle. Anyway, my trauma stems from my childhood and not being in a caring, loving, supportive environment. I have had numerous failed relationships until I met my now wife. We have been together 24 years, married 16, 2 kids etc. Our relationship has always been challenging, lots of arguments etc. I would reach a point where I would become frustrated and criticise her lack of caring, intimacy, support etc. (most arguments were from her being a little high maintenance). Anyway, I have shared an overview of my relationship with my wife, the dynamic etc with my psychiatrist. She believes that I fell in love with someone that recreated an environment that was similar to the environment I was brought up in. On reflection, this does make perfect sense, and is clearly evident when looking back over the years.
Here we are now, I finally have a diagnosis, I know I can recover, but our relationship is on its last legs, discussing separation etc. I don’t think she can take the journey with me through DBT etc., I’m nurse she wants to. But my question is, was our marriage a sham in the first place? Did my BPD make me fall in love? Is it really someone I truly want to be with? God! Just when you think you are on a road to recovery, you get thrown a curve ball and now possibly throwing divorce into the mix. Any thoughts? # BPD #qbpd #Divorce #Relationships