Colon Cancer

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Colon Cancer
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Me and big sweet Ben who I just lost to colon cancer:(

Daisy(my little Tibeten Spaniel mix) and I are so devastated by Ben's death ,


I have cancer and it has put a limit on my social life

I have 4th stage metastatic colon cancer and the guy I’m seeing just told me he doesn’t want to get serious because I have cancer and the relationship isn’t going to go anywhere. I have tried dating other guys but they don’t seem interested. I only really have one friend. I’ve tried volunteering but no one needs anyone in my area. I’m getting extremely depressed and sit home alone a lot. I really need friends in my life. Would love to have a relationship. I’m on all kinds of depression medication. Doesn’t seem to be working. Any advice?

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My Beautiful wife

I’ve always had anxiety from a young kid but I tucked it away as if that’s how a man is supposed to do because who truly cares about a man’s feelings we are built to put it on our shoulders and keep moving forward. My world completely changed June of last year when my wife was diagnosed with stage four metastatic colon cancer a couple weeks before her 39th birthday. Then less then a month later she was also diagnosed with stage four metastatic breast cancer. At the peak of our marriage we get hit with this we’ve been together almost 20 years with 5 beautiful kids and 2 grandchildren. It’s been a battle trying to be here for her 100% also trying to juggle making sure the kids are taking care of keeping my job and everything else. My wife is a fighter and we will continue to fight but I find my self so stressed, depressed also overwhelmed I can’t heal her is what hurts the most I’ve always made most situations better now faith is all we have and a positive attitude. If any on here believes in our almighty god please say a prayer for my beautiful wife.

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Not doing well

Health issues and work issues. I am mentally not great. I feel myself slipping away and I don't know what to do. I am trying to hold on and get through the rough times. But I want to give up. When I say give up I don't know what I mean. I have a husband a 13 year old twins. I feel like my health issues are killing me. I am failing at my job. I am on a performance plan at work. If I wouldn't financially cripple my family I would quit. I was in therapy for years but I stopped when it just felt like whining. I need help. I need something but I don't know what I need. My whole life I have always felt alone and a failure. My family was shit. My father died when I was 12, my mother when I was 22. I had cancer the first time at 19. My life got upended by the first cancer dx. I tried for years to get my feet back under me. Then I got married and had kids. Fast forward to 2010 I had my twins, found out I had heart failure and a week heart. Seven years later I had colon cancer and lung cancer. Rectum removed and lung. Now my heart is failing again. I just had mitral valve repair in January. Then all the chaos in my health is now making me fail at my job. I feel like a piece of shit that cannot do anything right. Part of me just wants to die from all of this. I have been fighting for so long. I just want to stop.

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My stupid mouth won't stop...

I had one of those moments when my mouth would not stop. My brain is constantly analyzing everything. It's part of what makes me really good at my job and part of what makes most people super irritable with me in general conversations. I can't tell you how many times I have been told to "not overthink 'x'" and then had to bite my tongue when one by one all my points manifest in real life.
I have a boat load of degrees and better than 20 years experience with the biggest names in the world.
Still, when .y mouth started running tonight about my cancer diagnosis, I saw my mom's a gloss over with the expression, "Oh my God! Stop being a drama queen!" Which she promptly followed up with, "Don't get lost in the minuta, dear."
I know better than to talk to people about my concerns. It's either platitudes or dismissal. Grrr....

#ColonCancer #Cancer #Anxiety #Depression #ADHD #PTSD

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